New and I'm a disaster

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2008
New and I'm a disaster
15
Thu, 05-28-2009 - 8:54am

Hello everyone,


I just need some help and advice - I'm at my wits end! I am a mom of 5 (still at home). I am about 600.00 minimum short on income every month before credit card payments. My hours have recently been cut from 52 a week to 40 and that translates to 1,000.00 less every month.


My fiancee is a full-time student in his last year of school (he went back before we met when construction jobs here dried up.) So I support all seven of us. He will be a dual-major teacher by next summer.


Credit card payments are becoming impossible because the minimums are about 700.00 per month and they won't put me on a program because my income isn't enough. My electric bill is overdue and I can't sleep from worry at this point. The only thing I ever pay on-time is my rent, $1500.00 per month. My X never pays child support so I can't count on that either.


I will work any extra hours I can get but they just don't have them consistently, so I can't count on them. Any help would be greatly appreciated. I just don't know where to start. I am not a good money manager and everytime I try to set a budget, some emergency comes up, like a car problem, and I have to take money allotted from one thing to pay the emergency. Then I'm late with something else.


Also, my credit is very messed up from my divorce, x left me with bills he never paid and a judgement of 1,600.00. The credit card debt we have now is in my fiancee's name. He had NO debt and excellent credit when we got together,

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2006
Thu, 05-28-2009 - 11:36am

Welcome Beach Chic.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2006
Thu, 05-28-2009 - 12:18pm

I'm pretty much a disaster most of the time myself. I, like you, seem to come up short every month and when things like emergencies happen, I'm out of luck. I'm currently working on an emergency fund because I have realized that without a thousand dollars or so in a savings account, I'm never going to be able to handle those small things that happen like car repairs or home repairs. It's really really hard to come up with a thousand dollars when you have no money to spare, but it will save you from having to steal from peter to pay paul. I've been there so many times. I don't have much advise for you. I went through a debt settlement company and I wouldn't recommend it because they ruined my credit and caused me to be sued by a credit card. Then I was in real trouble! My only advice is to keep your chin up and try some stress relief during your day. I'm only 30 years old and I have grays coming in and wrinkles starting and I completely blame the last 3 years of financial ruin! It takes a long time, but if you are diligent, there is hope.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2007
Thu, 05-28-2009 - 10:15pm

Hello, and welcome.


I am sorry things are such a mess for you right now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Thu, 05-28-2009 - 11:48pm

it is so hard when you just don't bring in enough to make it. Have you sat down and explained where you are with your boyfriend. I would think there is something he can do to bring in a little money a month at least enough to pay his bills and help you a little with yours.


Maybe it is going to take moving to a cheaper place. That might be all you can do at this point. First I would sit down and make a list of all the things you pay on a month. Car insurance, renters insurance or homeowners, Lights, cable, cell phone the whole nine yards and start cutting.


No one is great managing money unless they have some to manage. I know times are hard it maybe that for a while until he can work and help out you will have to make some really strong cuts like the internet even. But with his support I am sure you will make it.


Just take one step at a time and I would really look for a cheaper place to live.


Mary Ann


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2008
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 10:25am

Hi All,


Thanks everyone for responding. I am going to try to call a consumer credit counselling agency. I will be careful and let you know what they say.


Unfortunately moving right now would be tough. People don't want to rent to families with a lot of kids, and legally I can't have less than 3 bedrooms. I had a hard time getting this one, and of course can't come up with another month and a half security. New Jersey is expensive and this is about the going rate here. I have a line on a cheaper 4 bedroom house owned by a friend, but we can't get in until the current tennant's lease is up in October.


Also, my fiancee is currently in the midst of full-time classes but he is trying to get something part time. One of us does have to be home with the kids, so I don't know how many hours he will really be able to put in, but he is working on it.


It's just so frustrating. I really do not want to declare bankruptcy. I want to pay my bills and be responsible. I think I will definately try to look at our expenses and cut down. It's funny I just didn't think of that, but maybe I can cut back or get a better deal on some things. The electric is really a killer.


I don't understand why I am so horrible at budgeting. I simply don't know how to do it. I think when I sit down it is so overwhelming that I can't organize properly or get focused. I'm all over the place! I'm glad I found this board.


Thanx,


Beach_Chic


Avatar for 2locachicas
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2003
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 10:48am

Has your fiance tried UPS or Fed Ex? He could be a package loader. They work 4 hours shifts at night and make like $9 an hour. But they also will pay up to 3k per year towards until school.


You need to make a list of all your bills and list them by priority. So you can just go down the list and pay as much as you can. Unfortunately, unless your fiance gets a job his credit will tank.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2008
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 12:15pm

Well actually I work nights, so he's with the kids. Otherwise that would be a great idea and actually I will give my son that tip. He's looking too. (He's 19 and out on his own.)


I will start to write my list: Rent, elec., food etc.


BTW.. someone had mentioned child support services.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2008
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 1:07pm

I'm so sorry for the jam your in.

Norma


"Patience is the best remedy for every trouble"- Plautus


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 1:23pm

I am really sorry you are behind. I know how frustrating this can be. I really hope the credit counseling comes through for you. Big red flags for bankruptcy are having to charge food and gas, and $700 minimum payments must be overwhelming. Not to mention the $600 behind each and every month. I know things will be better for you once your fiance gets a job. I hope you can can hang on until then. Good luck.



iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 8:39pm

Glad to know that the boyfriend is watching the kids That is saving you money right there.


My husband Now you understand this is not much money but it might help you out with Kids clothes and such.

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