not a good day

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2006
not a good day
16
Mon, 07-20-2009 - 11:18pm

Frankly ladies today I want to fold over and raise my white flag. I know giving up is not an option but I just don't see a light at the end of the tunnel to our debt. How are we supposed to pay off $20K in debt when we have every penny accounted for with each paycheck?

I have nothing left to sell on Ebay. Unless I change my mind again and not go to school (part-time) and instead just get a 2nd job I have no room to earn money beyond my regular paycheck.

Honestly I feel like I just - can't- breathe. I don't want to give up and sell our home (beside my DH says we are no where near needing to do that) but I hate this. The debt makes me feel like a failure and not being able to make any kind of decent dent in it is sucking the life out of me.

I don't wan to be a complainer - my whole life I have made solutions to thinks, managed projects, and got things done.

This time I feel had - done in and like I am just immobilized. Is this what my life is going to be?

Aw crud now I sound like "poor me".

:-( Sorry

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 5:43am

Can I talk to you like a dutch aunt?


I just checked the 2009 Snowflake page. You have paid off 5000.00 in this year. Now really think about that. That is almost a 1000.00 a month you and your family has paid off.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2007
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 6:59am

I know how you feel, Michelle, but it will come. You just bought your home so if you are making payments on time, I'd tough it out until you're in a better position. Are you putting aside money for retirement? Are you paying more than the minimum on credit cards? Something tells me you're just fine, you may just need to look at the big picture. Where will you be in 5 years?

It can feel completely overwhelming at times, but you are young and not irresponsible. BTW, we have every penny accounted for too and DH gets upset with me ("I never have any money!") but he does have money, it's just in the budget, and if he spends it all he has to wait. (BABY!)

Dee



Avatar for sullengurl
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 7:49am

Hi,


I think it depends on how much time you have left in your schooling and just how dire your financial circumstances are...Also, depends on what your projected earnings will be when you graduate and the likelihood of getting a job.


One thing I sort of regret is going full speed ahead at schooling and having a "we'll deal with the debt once school's done" attitude. This was more my husband than myself but I kind of went along with it, albeit kicking and screaming because I didn't know how to effect change. But now I'm working in my field and it is tough. We have an end in sight but I'm wondering if all this time, effort, sweat and tears was really worth the position we are in now. Mainly, could there have been a better, more productive way of getting there in the first place?


Good luck in whatever you decide to do. Only you and your family can make that decision.


Take care!

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 11-02-1999
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 8:49am

I just wanted to say that I understand how you feel, as I'm sure every one of us here has felt this way one time or another through the journey -- heck, I feel it more often than not. You are not alone!

I like what Maryann said about looking at what you've accomplished, rather than how far you still have to go. There's really something to that -- and it sounds like you have done great so far this year, so take heart in that.

Hang in there!










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Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 8:56am

Hey Michelle - part of a decision to go back to school has to involve a component of slowing down the debt repayment *for the time being.* It may only be a couple/few years, or it may be that you only really go after the totals in the summer months, or not. But if at the end of the schooling you qualify for a higher paying job, then that is what you should focus on. Frankly as long as you're not adding to the debt, it has nowhere to go but down, little by little, while you're in school. Don't get so tweaked by tunnel vision that you can't see the big picture. Sounds like your DH has some good perspective in terms of the house and the debt...listen to him! :)

Good luck with school!

All my best,
Danni
cl-phocid, Debt Support Group



All my best,
Danni

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2009
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 9:36am

Very well said!

I won't give up on school, or even postpone it. Having completed both graduate degrees while working full-time, you have to do it when you are reasonably young and energetic. Secondly, say, if you plan to work till you are 65 or 70. If you finish your degree at age 30, the efforts (both financial and time) translate to 40 years of added benefit. If you finish your degree at age 50, it is only 20 years..

In previous posts you explained that you wanted to do this not just for increased earning potential but also for your own interest. I think it is great! And perhaps once you immerse yourself in it, you will have less time to fret about debt. ;-)

Good luck with school and try to enjoy the experience.

edited for spelling error




Edited 7/21/2009 10:08 am ET by marie_1229
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2005
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 11:25am

You have come so far in such a short amount of time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 11:38am

Go to school. Even 20 years of added benefit is great. It sounds like your debt journey may be slowed but heck at least it wouldn't be adding to the debt. Could you sell your text books after you finish with them for flaking money? I agree with PPs, look at the 5 year forecast and how you can slam the debt better once you are done with schooling. You sounded so excited about it awhile ago( and some of it paid for to boot?), I'd hate to see you kicking yourself if you didn't go.


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2009
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 12:41pm

I guess perhaps I was unclear.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2000
In reply to: smoochdog
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 12:59pm

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