I have a gifted child
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| Tue, 10-27-2009 - 9:21am |
I have 3 sons, but my oldest has always been special. I think God gifted me with him because I was 19 when I got pregnant and I needed a child that would pretty much take no work at all! He is a joy to everyone he ever comes in contact with and not only that, he is incredibly smart. He was accepted into an advanced learning program called L.E.A.P. (Learners with Exceptional Academic, Artistic, Altruistic Potential). He won 1st place in the 4th grade state science fair last year. He sings, plays instruments, gets the lead in plays. He's just everything a parent could hope for in a child and he loves to learn. He can't get enough. He wants to be a scientist and go to MIT. All I can say is that he is incredible and I have felt extremely unworthy of him. We've spent the last 5 years not having any money. We can't afford to do anything for him. No sports unless they are free, no music lessons unless they are free. And I've tried to do my best with what I've had, but next year he's going to be going to a middle school that has a bad reputation. We don't live in the best part of town here in our city. There's violence in this school that has been featured on the news!
Recently, I had a thought in my head that just hasn't gone away. I wondered if I could get him into a private school and with his intelligence and fantastic personality and our low income, we would qualify for financial aid. And not just any financial aid, but a LOT of financial aid! Well, I'm starting the process right now. The only problem is, I don't want to get my son's hopes up that he's going to be going to some amazing school. One of the schools I'm looking at now is called The Derryfield. It's right in my city, but it's a college prep school that costs 23,000 dollars a year! I've talked with the admissions lady and she says that they have accepted LEAP students before and that Aaron sounds like he has potential. She also said that they have given out a lot of financial aid, from 5% TO 95%! I have to at least try. And if the derryfield doesn't work out, there are many other schools in this area that aren't quite at their level, but would be better than the public school!
My husband and I make 60,000 a year and we're a family of 5. Do you think this could qualify us for 95% financial aid? Holy cow!
Here's the school...pretty cool. www.derryfield.org

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Go for it!
Sadly, public schools vary according to states, districts, and the times.
It goes beyond that. Gifted education varies within schools in the same district as well.
Connor's elementary school of 720 students only had 7 Gifted identified students. So they had pull out twice a week and Connor was assigned a mentor to work with him one on one, once per week.
While other elementary schools with higher GT numbers offered classes like Latin and held science fairs.
In middle school the numbers were a bit higher and they have daily workshops the kids could attend. They had to ask their teacher to miss class to attend these but typically not a problem. Middle school also ranked students so there was an honor's level program and lots of clubs and organizations for them to get involved in.
Another middle school in my district had the addition of having a special counselor trained to work with Gifted children, so they always had someone to go to who "got" how gifted children thought differently.
At the high school level there isn't much beyond lunch time support group, honors level and AP courses. However, our course selections are amazing. We have a working television studio, robotics lab, and access to courses offered at two other schools. One is our town's second high school and the other is all the agriculture, veterinary, and forestry courses offered at a high school in a neighboring town.
In addition. Connor's Gifted teacher followed him. He had her from third grade through tenth. But times have changed and budgets were cut. So this year he's on his own.
He has an IAP that states that he is to take honors level and AP courses and be allowed to do independent studies.
stacy
Hi Abbie,
I wasn't sure if you would want to hear that from someone smart enough for the enrichment program in her schooling or high enough IQ to be in Mensa who is a temp. After all, what parent dreams of their kids being a temp? "Honey, you make me so proud! And the way you have a work diary to cover your own ass..."
But if you believe it is all a step on the way to establishing one's life and/or it's about personal enrichment, then I say you needn't worry if your DS ends up staying in public school.
First, teachers always find a way to keep you challenged. My school had a program for the enriched kids at another school but for some reason I couldn't go (it was all the way across town, don't know if that had an effect or my special needs) and my school didn't have the programs to support us. So, my teachers would notice quickly that I was smart and always gave me extra work to complete my assignments or held my papers to ridiculously high standards to get the same A as everyone else. At the time, I was frustrated by such a double standard but ultimately it was good for me. I was always challenged.
Also, there were always these special events that were meant for the "enriched kids" that they would give passes to other schools as well. They would be things like special classes at the university (paid for by the school board) or concerts. My school always made sure people in my group got first dibs on all these special educational events.
The truth is that teachers love the smart kids and dedicated learners. I think they all love learning and just take that opportunity to indulge both in the child and nurturing their own spirit again, feeling good about the encouragement. Besides, if you really love learning (which it sounds like DS does) you will always find the opportunities out there.
Second, about the violence in school: my school was not the most violent in the city but often made newspapers for the violence as it was higher (and scarier) than most schools. I have to say I was pretty blind to it growing up. Granted, I didn't encounter it until high school but I rarely saw anything. The reason is that it has more to do with your circle and the kind of person you are. Every time there was a fight or a stabbing, I was always somewhere else: choir/band, play rehearsal, youth ministry, homework club* or even just at a student-teacher meeting. Also, they are usually in-fights, not random violence unless you live in a real gang area. I never really understood how violent my school supposedly was except noticing the occasional article in the paper and people's reactions when I tell them what high school I went to.
I only ever witnessed three things and I wasn't damaged for life: (1) a girl from a rough neighbourhood was really smart and was visited by a neighbourhood friend who brought a switchblade, but we told her we were uncomfortable and she freaked out at him for even bringing it-telling him to ditch it off school property and go back for it, leave or stop being her friend- and he chose to leave; (2) walking back from the bathroom, I saw someone robbing lockers but I was smart enough to duck into any filled classroom and tell the teacher, who called security to have him arrested - and there's security at every school, just not always visible; (3)a student was upset after a fight with a teacher, meant to pound the wall and put his fist through a windowed door - but I've seen stupid things like that even in "normal schools" and university.
So, long story short, private school may provide some advantages but who you are and meeting like-minded people will win out anywhere you go. And the smart kids know to leave the vicinity of the crime before they turn start turning on the crowd ;)
(just kidding! I hope the humour comes through in text)
Congratulations and best wishes!
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*Homework club, as geeky sounding as it is, was the best! And I really never enjoyed homework. If DS ends up in public school, find out if one exists or if administration would be amiable to having one. I can tell you all about it.
Thanks for the encouragement. DS does have a good group of friends, but they are all going to be split up after elementary school. I know that he's very innocent and probably won't notice much if he does have to attend the public middle school. And he's already in band and orchestra. We'll just have to make sure that he gets what he needs if the financial aid doesn't pull through.
Thanks!
I just wanted to echo what PP said. I was also identified as a gifted student and was put in a special class for it. When I got to highschool I never had any problems. The teachers were great and let me challenge myself. I qualified for an exchange to Italy and my French teacher let me learn Italian as well for the semester before I left!
As long as your son has a strong support system (think good friends) and is occupied with extra curriculars I wouldnt' worry too much about it. Just make sure he knows that he can come to you with any concerns he has!
Congrats on having a great family! You are doing something right!!!
Bex -
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift -thats why its called the present."
Bex -
My husband and I thought long and hard about taking her out of the private school. We realized that a private school does not guarantee success. It depends on the initiative and effort of the student as well as the support and dedication of the parents. This became clear when my husband hired a 24 yr old as a dishwasher who had graduated from the same private school. My friend's two children who graduated from the public schools in our area are now attending Princeton and Brown Universities.
Now, my daughter is much happier. There is a lot more diversity in her new school and she feels like she fits in. She actually smiles every day when I pick her up from school.
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