I'm really struggling here . . .

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2003
I'm really struggling here . . .
14
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 9:00am

This is totally off topic, but I am really, really struggling today (and for the last few days in general). I am having a much harder time then I thought with bf moving out :(


I am having a hard time getting out of bed lately. Typically this time of year is bad for me to begin with, but throwing all the drama in the mix and I don't know how I'm going to make it through. I have been


Bex -

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Avatar for cl_beckymk
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 9:09am

I'm sorry!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 11:19am

Oh my dear, this too shall pass. I myself would not like the uncertainty of it all. I mean, are you guy still together or not? Because honestly I don't get that. He moves out but you are still dating? I would want closure myself other wise I would have no direction. You can't get over something or pursue it if you don't know what is going on.

I don't have anything wrong right now and my weight has been slowly creeping up. I am just eating too much! January is good time to deal with that right? LOL! Don't worry too much about it right now. Deal with one(or 7 other)things right now. Eat some cheetos and drink a bottle of wine to get your mind off everything. I know what you mean about the November dumps though. Just try to concentrate on friends and Christmas.

Give yourself some more time. This is a big change.

Chin up Bex!


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2008
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 2:29pm

I wish I had some magical words to send that would snap you out of the gloomy mood, but sadly, I don't.

Norma


"Patience is the best remedy for every trouble"- Plautus


Avatar for sohappilyme
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 2:38pm

Aw, (((hugs)))! I'm so sorry you're having a hard time, but anyone would be after what you've been through. Even if you're still together, it probably feels like a giant step backward in a relationship you most likely wanted to see move forward. That's a sucker punch under the best of circumstances.

Between money being extra tight this month and the all-day-and-night "morning" sickness, I've been bummed lately. Totally not like me. But I finally got back to work and it felt so good to work again. I was even up until 1:20 a.m. finishing a project and barely able to keep my eyes open, and it was almost funny that the night before I was up almost that late not able to sleep. Odd perspective change, but pretty glaring!

No ground breaking advice here, but just find something that makes you feel good and enjoy it. Most of us are fortunate enough to have a childhood memory or tradition that makes us feel fabulous during the holidays. Maybe if you baked some cookies and decorated them (or baked some Christmas "cookies" for dogs - there are recipes all over the internet) you might get your spirit back. For some reason the holidays are extra lonely even with all of that family stuff going on, and it's always hard for me to figure out how I can feel so alone in a crowd but sometimes it just happens. I think the most important this is to LET yourself feel bummed about it and not fight those feelings. Try to distract yourself with something fun, but don't tell yourself not to feel the way you do. You'll probably work through it faster if you face those feelings head on.

(((Hugs))) and happy days to you. =c)

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Sarah
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2009
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 4:56pm

Hey Bex...I'm so sorry your feeling terrible...


Please don't let this go on too long.


Give your EAP provider a call and hook up to see a therapist.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2008
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 5:04pm
So sorry that you are having a hard time. I think you need to be a little gentle on yourself. You are going through a major change. I agree with Duke on making a few EAP sessions to help you talk through are your feelings and to help you move forward. Take care of yourself.





iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2007
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 5:44pm

Oh Bex, I'm so sorry to hear this!

Kate


empty purse

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-1998
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 6:36pm
Hi Bex
This time of year gets me down as well, I have found that going to a tanning place helps. I go a few times a week for about 5-8 minutes a time.
Sharon




iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2007
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 6:41pm

{{{HUGS}}} Bex.


I, too, think it might be best for you to visit your doctor.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2003
Mon, 11-30-2009 - 7:43pm

I think those of us in the north often tend to have lowered moods when it gets dark so early and gets light so late!!

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