Trying to get used to changed lifestyle
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| Fri, 01-08-2010 - 11:49pm |
DH and I are 60 years old and have been married 8 years.
3 years ago, I was offered a great job in another state. DH and I moved to take it since he has a job that is available everywhere. We were doing pretty good.
We've never had but 2 credit cards. One with a $500 limit and one with a $2000 limit. We used them mostly for my business travel and also for things like tires, car parts, etc. We drive older cars and had no debts other than the cars, child support and credit cards.
My new job had a salary of $70K. We rented a house for $910/month that we loved. Nice little house in a nice little neighborhood. Nothing fancy but comfortable and the landlord had no problem with pets, which was important to us. After renting for nearly 3 years, we were able to get a mortgage. Total monthly payment is $789, which is lower than the rent.
However, I was terminated last April and his job went from 60 hours/week to 32 hours/week due to the economy. Jobs are scarce and he is lucky to have that. I was on unemployment for 8 months until I was approved for disability. I didn't expect disability to be approved that soon nor did I expect disability to be so much less than unemployment. So in less than a year, I've gone from $70K to a little over $15K.
We should have been done with child support but the kid has failed about 3 grades due to not showing up at school (we found out) and we have to pay another year. She will be 19 then. Child support is $655/month for one child. We have never been successful at getting it lowered except when the other 2 children came of age and then it was not lowered much.
Our cars are both 2001 and will be paid off in a year. They were purchased used and financed at the car lot (interest rate was reasonable and loan easy to get).
I suggested to DH that we sell my car but he said no since he needs his truck daily to work and I need mine for my frequent doctor visits. Plus, when work gets better, he'll likely go back on the road and I'll need a car. There is no public transportation and no taxi service where we live.
I cook all our meals when we were used to eating out a lot. I try to average a maximum of $6 per meal. Leftovers are lunch the next day. I have a small freezer that I use a LOT to make meals ahead of time. I haven't bought any clothes at all, even from thrift stores. I quit getting my nails and hair done (ok I look a bit ragged but I rarely leave the house). I did get them done for my mother in law's funeral.
We have taken all necessary steps to lower our utility bills. We did, however, keep the satellite TV. Because of my physical disabilities, I spend a lot of time on the sofa and watching TV is a great source of entertainment. We don't rent movies and we don't go out at all so we feel this one entertainment is ok. We have internet through a DSL line but I do all of our personal business on the internet and I'm still hunting for work. We have litigation issues ongoing because of my mother's estate and I need to be able to send and receive documents and emails daily. I also maintain my social and business connections via internet.
I don't buy tax programs anymore - I use free ones on the internet. We shop garage sales for any items we need before considering buying them.
I would like to further my education by completing my doctorate but getting funding at my age is tough. There are retraining funds available through disability but they don't like to provide education to anyone over 50. I don't want to take out a student loan at my age when we have a new mortgage. I would be less disabled if I could get 2 surgeries but we can't afford the copays until after we're done paying child support in a year. DH hates it when I have to remind him of that. He knows the sacrifices I've made for his totally ungrateful kids.
I'm not sure that anyone can give me any ideas but I sure needed to vent tonight. It's hard changing a lifestyle so drastically in such a short period of time. I feel trapped at times. It's tough when I have to have medications refilled and we don't have enough money for copays because another bill must be paid. I know I'll be sick without them but I have to get through it.
Thanks for listening. I don't like to talk to my friends about it because I don't want to sound like I'm whining.

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