Fell off the debt reduction wagon....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2010
Fell off the debt reduction wagon....
13
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 2:26pm

...badly, seriously badly.

Hence why I haven't been around much, I am so depressed about it all.

I can go around in circles about what happened and why but regardless, I am up sh*t creek right now financially. All I have to say is it involved a weekend with no kids and alcohol...always affects (ends?) our judgement.

On a good note, apparently on the way off the wagon, DH hit his head pretty hard and knocked some good sense into him. He's pretty pissed off at the poor choices we made as of late and I added up all our little "vices" that I still kept in our budget...you know those little things we think we need to keep sane with 5 kids and all...you know smoking, alcohol, ordering pizza here & there, paying a sitter to get a break, our "nights out", etc...and if we cut ALL of it out (not likely, but nice to dream), it would save us $21,000 over the next 5 years. Things look a little less "need"ful when you add it up like that!

So I hope we're back on the wagon.

But at the same time, there's some life stuff going on that's really depressing me...mainly volunteer stuff that I was really committed to, that gave me something to do in my spare time and fulfilled me as something other than a mom...I had to give up because honestly, the other women & I just weren't jiving...they were so "clique-ey". :( It sux bcs I was so passionate about the project...
So the wagon fall, that, the other life crap, making me pretty depressed and I'm hoping I can snap out of it soon. Either that or I'll have to go on some (more) medication, which I don't really want to at all!

Thanks for listening.

Melissa
~ Mom to 5 ~
~ Melissa ~ ‎"We need to find the courage to say NO to the things and people that are not serving us, if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity." - Barbara de Angelis

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2005
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 2:35pm
Hi, I am a long-time lurker and occasional poster. I hear ya on the falling off the wagon. :(
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2010
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 3:15pm

uh oh, no kids and alcohol, the last time DH and I were in that position we spent a week wondering how it was humanly possible to drink that much money and live to tell the tale.


I think sometimes you have to unwind. I can't even imagine the stress of 5 kids plus all the other problems you've been having lately. Hopefully you'll find a comfortable middle ground so you don't always feel so guilty for spending money on fun stuff.

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 3:23pm

Melissa,

I wondered where you were. Let me bet the first to say don't be afraid to post because you are spending money and feel guilty. We all do that. Come for the support in those times as well as when you are saving money. This is a journey with ups and downs.

You don't need to cut out every enjoyment in life to be successful in this. You have learned perhaps you need to save for weekends away to unwind. This is a discovery process for everyone.

PS: Oh the things I could and should buy that come to mind at the end of a bottle of wine......







iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2008
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 3:24pm

The good thing Melissa, the wagon always stops or slows down for you to jump right back on.

Norma


"Patience is the best remedy for every trouble"- Plautus


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2005
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 3:31pm
Hey, with a weekend of no kids and booze, just be grateful you didn't end up as young_momof6.

Angel

Wife to Wayne, Mommy to Tyler (15), Nickolas (3) and Noah (1)

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-1998
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 3:33pm

Too bad about your falling off the wagon, but glad to hear your DH got a bit of sense knocked into him on the way. It will really help to have him on board.

About your volunteer stuff, is there any other projects that you also feel really strongly about that you can join? I know how it is when you don't click with the other people volunteering, (I used to belong to Kinettes)

Hope you feel better soon and that your weather gets better. I'll be in Calgary in 3 weeks and am hoping for nice spring/summer type weather.



iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2009
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 3:35pm

Listen ---what's done is DONE!!!

Lila
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 4:00pm

Funny - I thought you were going to say you were pregnant when I was reading the beginning of your post too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2010
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 4:05pm

Ah, do I know the feeling of falling off the wagon.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2010
Thu, 04-29-2010 - 4:47pm

Bahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Knew I could count on you ladies for support and a good laugh! Pregnant again! I would seriously have a heart attack if that we're to happen! Oh my!
(We got DH all fixed up after #5, so hopefully that will NEVER happen again!)

It is humbling. We've messed up before but not like this, in the midst of a time when we have like $10G that has to be paid out in the next 2 months, and 4 birthday parties! Now it's back to playing catch up I suppose.

Oh well, you ladies have given me a more positive outlook about it all, thanks :)

Melissa
~ Mom to 5 ~
~ Melissa ~ ‎"We need to find the courage to say NO to the things and people that are not serving us, if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity." - Barbara de Angelis

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