What's the reaction to your pregnancy?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2008
What's the reaction to your pregnancy?
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 6:19pm

Hello All,

I am 43 and 7 weeks pregnant. My husband and I have been trying for over 10 years and now we are off and running with the help of fertility drugs and a donor. I have a daughter from a previous relationship that my husband raised who is 24 years old. Ya, we are starting all over again.

I am nervous about telling my family. I don't need to be, but being pregnant at 17 and pregnant at 43 can be cause for some raised eyebrows. What have some of your experiences been?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2010
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 7:09pm

After getting over my own initial shock I too was worried about what others might think at 41.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Sat, 06-26-2010 - 11:07pm
My friends were thrilled for me, my family thinks I am nuts. Of course I already have 6 children (3 of them born in my 40's). My MIL thinks I am too old to be doing this and my parents just don't mention it. Oh well, I am Thrilled! I don't really concern myself w/ my family or in-laws reactions, figure it is jut their loss anyway. They are missing out on a blessing of a new grandchild. Of course, they usually come around once the baby is born.

Carol, mom to 6PhotobucketPhotobucket

Carol, mom to 7

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2009
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 11:57am

First off, congratulations!

I"m 46 and we're having our first after several years of infertility treatments and IVF with our own eggs/sperm.

I'm pretty sure my family has written us off but they seem quite excited about the whole thing now that the shock has worn off. My in-laws are very happy as well. All of our friends have been super supportive.

The only negative reactions I've seen/heard is from others outside my personal circle in regards to older women having children in general. Those reactions are usually from younger women or women who have chosen not to have children and they range from "you're stupid" to some very vicious and nasty comments that I choose to ignore.

For some reason people seems to feel it is their right to tell "us" older women exactly how to live and what to do. To them I throw a substantial raspberry (pphtht!) I won't judge them and they shouldn't just me.

Anyway - back to you. You should be happy and excited and let your families in on your joy as you feel comfortable - I agree that maybe you want to start with someone you know will be supportive but in the end - I wish for you that they all are supportive and join you in welcoming your new baby.



Susan L.


Susan L.

Robert Edward Xavier Lin - Born July 31, 2010 at 5:56AM, 6 pounds 4 ounces and 19 inches long. He spent 2 weeks in the NICU but he's doing great now!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2008
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 2:01pm

Hi Susan,

Thank you for the confidence booster. We made an announcement to our family yesterday during a family gathering here at our home. Everyone was very excited and screamed with joy when they heard the news.

Lots of tears of joy and hugs which was very different from when I announced I was pregnant at 17 :) Yes, I am starting over again at 43 with my husband of 20 plus years first child. We are very excited and I am glad I finally let everyone know.



Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 4:15pm
I'm so glad that you got such a great reaction from your family!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2008
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 4:40pm
I'm glad you got such a positive reaction!

Robynne mama to Emily (3/26/99), Allison (5/13/02)

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2006
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 11:06pm

The beauty of being pregnant after 40 is that I am confident enough not to give a care about what anyone thinks!!!!!!!!!!