Need Reassurance
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| Thu, 06-22-2006 - 11:12am |
My hubby is the best thing ever on this earth! Last night I was laying in bed and having my freak out moment, because I just do not feel pregnant and the fact that my little peanut was measuring off by 6 days this last time and everything is just piling up on me. The fear of going through a fourth loss is too much to handle and the fear that not having a heart beat anymore. I have been trying to be so strong, but at the same time I am scared to death. I want to be a mommy to my peanut so much. I have been caring the ultra sound pictures around with me everywhere and just staring at my beautiful baby! I am so in love with this little one! I always thought that once I saw a heart beat I would calm down and feel that everything was going to be fine, but I have not calmed down! I mean you would think that a heart beat of 136 would reassure me! I am very lucky that I have such a wonderful doctor’s office, because next week I am going to call and try to get in for another ultra sound. It just scares me that my symptoms are not strong! I feel like it is torture to have no strong symptoms when everyone around me tells me that “I am lucky!” Well I do not consider this lucky.



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Jenn, I know this is such a scary time. I know how freaked out I was when I was about as far along as you were and didn't have symptoms yet, and I can only imagine multiplying that times three after all you have been through! I wish there was something I could do to make the next few weeks go by quickly for you. I think it's wonderful that you have such an understanding OB, and if you could get ultrasound every week or so to get you through the first trimester, that would be wonderful.
I truly believe that you will get to a turning point when you start to feel more confident, but unfortunately you just can't predict when that will be. Until then, just know that we are all here for you to support you in any way we can and to help you get through the next few weeks.
Love,
Andi
Oh Jenn, I am so sorry you are feeling so scared. It is completely understandable, considering everything you have been through. Please keep Wenz's mantra in mind - FAITH OVER FEAR. I wish I knew what to say that could comfort
Oh (((((((((((((((Jenn))))))))))))))), here are my reassuring hugs for you! We all know how nerve wrecking this can be, you are not a downer, I'm glad we can be here to hold your hands thru.
Good news is that you are emotional, that's one of the pg symptoms if you are looking for one so hard. I'm glad you are not puking your guts out, that can be too much, I know I'm on this side of the fence, it's easier for me to tell you how hard that is.
I'm praying for you and your little bean.
Love & more hugs,
Carol
Oh Jenn, honey, my morning sickness was just getting going at exactly this time in my pregnancy. I'm sure it will happen for you too.
Also, according to this website http://www.ivfer.com/pg_calc.htm your heartrate is exactly accurate. As for the CRL being off you didn't give the numbers so I can't offer any reassurance there. But that ivfer.com site also has CRL stats for early on in pregnancy. In any case measurements this early are not very good cause the beans are so tiny.
I had a heartrate of 86 at 6wks 0days and I was completely freaked because that was low but turns out it was all good. I hope it will be the same for you.
Also, you know, you don't have to be "up" and "happy" all the time. This board is here for you on your good days but it's best function is to help pick you up when you are down. We're here to help Jenn we want you to be happy but we love you when you are sad and scared too cause that's when you need us the most!
You're going to feel a "wobbly" for awhile. That's just the nature of this PAL business as you know too well. I'll be thinking about you and sending you every ounce of helpful vibes I can. I wish you and your baby nothing but the best. You deserve it and more than that, it is your destiny to be a Mom.
You can do this Jenn. I have faith in you.
Hi Jenn,
First of all I have to say that you are incredibly strong regardless of how freaked out you feel now. The fact that you had three losses and went on to try again amazes me. When I saw the HB at 6 weeks I was told the miscarraige rate was like 5% and then around 8 weeks it would drop to around 2-3% so while something could still go wrong, odds are in your favor! I'm sure you're doctor will do ultrasounds whenever you'd like considering your history.
Also, my SIL went in for her u/s at 8w2d and the baby only measured 7w0d and I was worried for her. She had another one done at 13 weeks and it measures exacttly at 13 weeks and she had one last week and the baby measured a week ahead so don't get too hung up on those dates and measurements, okay???
Nikki
EDD 09-22-06
Jenn
I completely understand - I have had 2 MC after seeing the HB both times. I had my 2nd US on Tuesday and was happy for about a day and then the worry started again. I am 8 weeks today so not enough ahead of you to really help but I have very few symptoms. My boobs are a little bigger but not much. I feel queasy if I don't eat but I don't think that is a PG thing - I am just hungry and that's it.
I don't feel like I have to pee all the time, my sense of smell isn't better, I'm not sick, I'm not that tired, etc, etc.
I don't have an answer but I do understand and am here for you. My next US is 7\3 and it feels like a life time away. I am going to my first OB appointment on Monday and am hoping they offer to do a US but as its just with the NP I'm not hopeful.
How you feeling today?
hugs
Rebecca
oh sweetie, it kills me to see that you are feeling this way.
Jenn,
We all know your fears and you have so many people praying and thinking of you, Chris, and your baby!
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