Hello all, new here and terrified !!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Hello all, new here and terrified !!
5
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 7:30pm
Hi I am Jenny, 30 yrs old mom to 2 beautiful kids, Maria (7) and Chris (6). I had two perfect pregnancies with them so when I had a missed m/c last Dec I was shocked!!! Never expected this to happen to me (yeah I know..who does?). Now I am 6w3d pregnant and though I had no cramping no spotting I cant help but being really horrified and depressed. I really CANNOT enjoy this pregnancy. Every day I wake up thinking that my baby might have died but I just dont know it yet. My first u/s is in 11 days (June 25th) Doctor said no need to see me earlier cause after 2 living children and only one m/c there are not many chances of this happening again.... This wont ease my mind though...

I can't wait to get t know you all!!!
Avatar for kzturtlegirl
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 8:01pm
Hey, Jenny! Welcome, and congratulations! I'm due just a few days ahead of you, on Groundhog Day. If all goes well, though, I'll probably be having little Tomato long after you have your baby, as mine tend to bake really long. hee hee.

I had a missed miscarriage in 1999. I found out at 11 weeks that the baby had died about one to two weeks earlier, and it took until 14 weeks for her to miscarry. I had no signs, other than that terrible u/s and poor HCGs afterwards that showed I would miscarry until that awful day when it all happened at once. So, I completely understand the reluctance to, nay, the utter impossibility of, trusting our bodies to tell us when something is wrong. Just not gonna happen. I did go on to have a healthy pregnancy after that, which was completely uneventful except for some PIH at the very end and a verrrrrry long labor. I then lost another baby to a suspected ectopic pregnancy, and then had another wonderful pregnancy and a healthy baby. Since this pg is so incredibly similar to my loss (including hard signs like implantation bleeding and some early swelling, down to silly signs like difficulties getting care, who I was around when I found out I was pg, etc.), that I am really kinda expecting it to end around 14 weeks. Well, I don't want to make this all about ME, since I'm responding to your introductory post, LOL, but I did want to say I understand. And what gets me through the tough loss-of-innocence times is just making the little milestones. So far, I have good HCGs, and tomorrow is my first ultrasound - hoping for a heartbeat INSIDE the uterus this time! One day at a time, that's really all you can do.

hugs,

katherine and Tomato edd 2-2-05

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 9:34pm
Hi Jenny,

I, like you have 2 dc. Matteo is 8 and David will be 7 in a couple of weeks. Perfect pregnancies! I was shocked when last year I lost my baby and had a dnc at 11 weeks. So when I found out about this pg, I was happy for a brief moment until the worry set in. I then could not accept that I was pg, and would not tell anyone until I was pretty sure this one was ok. The first weeks were very very hard b/c I made them hard. I worried about something new everyday. I still worry, but I think I am ready to believe that I am going to have this baby.

Last year, miscarriage was not something I even thought of as a possibility for me. I had two great pgs and two healthy children. Shocked is an understatement to what I felt. It hit my dh pretty hard too.

Anyway, you know how I felt b/c you have been there. But I just want to let you know that for me, it got easier as time went on. I set little milestones for myself and tried to be happy when I finally reached one. I have a long way to go still, but I feel more positive than worried nowadays. I am happy to be pg again and we are eagerly anticipating a new member to our family.

So, think positive thoughts ;)

Christine

EDD 12/1/04

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-11-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 10:02am
Hi Jenny-

Congrats on your pg. I'm just a day or two behind you & worried too. With the help of others I am trying to remember that I need to enjoy every moment of this pregnancy and not let the fear rob me of anything. I know it's hard-but try to relax & enjoy. Hopefully we'll see our beautiful babies in Feb!

-Laura

#1 EDD 2/5/05

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2003
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 10:37am
Welcome and BIG HUGS! I know what you mean! I had a perfect pregnancy with my DS and then had a missed m/c last September. Never thought it could happen to me! I hope that all will be well on the 25th and you'll see your little baby and a HB. Those early weeks are so scary. I cried almost every day this time around from about 8-11 weeks (when I lost my last pg).

Wishing you a very boring and perfect PG! Lots of SBVs!!!!

Lynn

DS #2 edd 9/19/04

26 weeks

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2003
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 11:41am

(((((((Jenny)))))))))


Somehow when the doctor says not to worry you worry more.