Lost baby in 2nd trim. - now pg. again

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2004
Lost baby in 2nd trim. - now pg. again
5
Thu, 08-05-2004 - 3:34pm
I'm 15 weeks pregnant. It's my 3rd pregnancy. My first one was great, I had my son no problem. But I lost the 2nd baby at 17 weeks (heartbeat stopped). Are there any other moms out there who lost a baby in their 2nd trimester. I'm paralyzed with fear, I almost can't believe that this pregnancy will work out. How are you dealing with it?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2003
Thu, 08-05-2004 - 5:29pm
Hi I am only 6 weeks pregnant now. I lost my baby at 19wks 5 dys he had died around wk 17 so I do understand your holding back your happy feelings. But In my opinion I believe that you have to enjoy every minute of this and just be as positive and happy as possible just believe you are. Your other alternative is to be miserable and I don't believe that will do us any good. There is plenty of time to be sad if God forbid something happens so until then just believe.

just my way of thinking for now

take care

Debby

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Thu, 08-05-2004 - 8:13pm
I am now 29 wks pg. I had my first son at 26 wks and lost the second baby at 15 wks for no apparent reason. I was petrified coming up onto the 15 wks. I was comforted by having an excellent relationship with my OB. I truly felt like we were and are on the same page and that she sincerely is devoted to getting me through this pg. I had US weekly from I think 10 wks through 24wks. I was nervous as all get out. Had spotting two times. Aches and pains that I wondered if they were just that or something more. But here I sit at 29 wks. Excited that I passed even the 26 wks. Farther than I ever thought I would be and still working and not a hint of bedrest or trouble. I have had very bad days and weeks where I worried too much and let my head get the best of me. So I think that good days and bad days or weeks, the best you can do is keep going and make sure that your OB knows your worries because they can't help if they don't know.

Good luck!!!

Krissy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 08-05-2004 - 11:34pm
Hi. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I totally understand how heartbreaking it is... We also found out that we had lost our son at 17 weeks about a year and a half ago with no apparent cause. Everything looked good with the baby and all of my tests turned out fine so we don't know what had happened -- we went for a regular appointment at 17 weeks on Halloween and found out that his heart had stopped beating. Having to be induced was absolutely heart wrenching... We are now 14 weeks pregnant and I am scared beyond belief. I completely understand your fears... I am so nervous that the same thing will happen again. I actually had a one-time bleeding episode at 6 weeks (but the baby got through that just fine) but I haven't had any other problems since then. However, it seems the closer I am getting to the point where we found out we had lost our little boy, the more nervous I am getting. I keep telling myself that the "risks" of losing this little one have gone down substantially once I got through the first trimester, however, after what we have gone through, it's hard to find comfort in the "statistics", isn't it? We did rent a home doppler which has been an absolute saving grace for me. I honestly don't know if I could stay sane in between doctor's appointments without hearing his or her little heart beating away. Every single time I hear the heartbeat I breathe an incredible sigh of relief. How are you coping with these fears? I do have to say, however, that amidst all these overpowering fears, this pregnancy feels completely different than my last one. From the very beginning of my last pregnancy, I felt like something was not quite right -- I could never pinpoint why I felt like that and I had had an uneventful pregnancy up until that point, however, I just never felt that things were "right". This pregnancy, however, feels completely different -- in my heart, I feel like everything will be okay with this baby although I am still completely scared out of my mind! I can't even tell anyone (other than 2 people) at work or even my extended family (other than my mom and sister) that we're expecting another little blessing because I feel like I need to wait and get past the point we lost our last little one.... Again, I am sooo sorry to hear about your loss -- I would love to talk more with you about this and find out how you are doing and what you are doing to cope with these incredible fears.... Please take care of yourself -- Caroline
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2003
Sun, 08-08-2004 - 10:29pm
We have had two second trimester losses, the most recent a little boy at 16 weeks last summer- I am now pregnant with a girl (our fifth, with one brother) due October 9. I was at the doctor Friday with a sinus infection, said I should be relaxing, but can't, you can never be naive again, and she agreed. She said it is never the same again- I think I'll relax when I hold her and she cries. I think all we can do is get good medical care, take care of ourselves, and try to be positive- hang in there! Tracy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2003
Sun, 08-08-2004 - 10:34pm
Also wanted to say- it is no comfort being in the 2nd or 3rd trimester- we do know way too much about being able to be safe- my doctors were shocked when my baby died, I had been bleeding for 12 of the 16 weeks- wish all of us could just take a little peek in the future-Tracy