Oh, Kathleen... I didn't see your post until now!
I don't even want to think about how stupid some people are!
Oh, Kathleen! Big ((HUGS))on your EDD with your twins. I understand, and I'm sure lots of other PALs do too. One baby -- or even two -- doesn't replace another. One person doesn't "make up" for another. It's OK to remember and grieve for your twins.
I've heard some TTCAM/PAL folks equate people's comments about moving on being akin to telling someone who just had their spouse pass away that it's OK, they can find another one. I hope no one would have such poor judgment, but that's what it feels like when people say things like that to us.
And, for the record, I think having my healthy DS almost reawakened my grief for my angel baby. It was like once he was here, I could finally realize how things should have gone the first time, and that I should have two healthy earth babies to love. It almost made it worse! So, I definitely get it ...
I love your idea on the balloons, and that's neat that your conceive date for DD was on the EDD for your twins. God seems to have an amazing sense of timing with things like that.
Hugs and healing to you,