Got Preg. on BC last year - vasectomy?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Got Preg. on BC last year - vasectomy?
7
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 9:39am
After the birth of my first child last summer - I went back on the BC pill I had used for 10 years. I missed two pills the 1st month & we used back up protection. The 2nd month I did not miss a pill but ended up pregnant. I had my 2nd son in June - they are 2 days shy of being 1 year apart. My husband & I didn't plan on the 2nd one so soon, but only planned on having 2 kids total. I am 30 and my husband is 29. We are 99% sure we only want 2 kids and my body did not do well being pregnant. I still have severe hip & back pain and am a little stressed from having 2 kids a year apart! Anyway - my question is - is 29 too young to ask my husband for a vasectomy? I really do not trust the pill and DO NOT want an IUD - I have NO DESIRE to get one and am so freaked out about having sex again that he and I haven't even kissed since the baby has been born because....well...we enjoy sex a lot & kissing almost always led to more.... hee hee....... :-). Just looking for thoughts/opinions. I truly beleive we are done & I'm happy with my 2 boys. But my hubby says "what about in 4-5 year - we may want another one". I truly don't think that my body will do well with another pregnancy especially in my mid-30's. I also am not too fond of the newborn stage & not sure I want to start all over again just as my boys are entering school........

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2003
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 10:28am
I was 29 & my husband was 31 when he got a vasectomy about a year & a half ago. No one even questioned that a man that age wanted a vasectomy (& the doctor who did it didn't even know we have no kids).

However, HE has to be ready for a vasectomy. If he is wondering about more kids, he isn't likely ready to do it.

Since you are sure, have you considered a tubal ligation? I've often heard that the partner who doesn't want (more) kids the MOST is the one who should get "fixed" & I have to agree with that sentiment.

Good Luck to you. I'm sure you're very stressed with two little ones!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2004
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 12:16pm
You could consider getting the shot that prevents you from being pregnant for a year at a time. Mind you, it also stops your period...for that one year. Just an option, in case you didn't trust the pill, and your hubby didn't want a vasectomy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2003
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 12:23pm
My husband recently had a vasectomy. We have 2 children, 2 years apart. He is 41, Im 39. We knew our family was complete and being 39, I know my days of having children will pretty much be over. We knew 7 years ago after conceiving our second child we were done, but sterilization was such a permanent thing so we held off. I agree with happyjusttwo that if either of you are not sure then it would be best to wait. What dont you like about an IUD? I was considering one(because I didnt want to have the surgery of a tubal) but then my husband went with the vasectomy. Take a look at them in the FAQ above. There is an excellent write-up about them. I know it is difficult raising 2 children so close in age but one day they will be grown. Sounds sappy but its so true. Best wishes to you and your family.

Josie

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2003
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 12:25pm
Good to see you happyjusttwo! How are things?

Josie

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2003
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 1:57pm
Hi!!!!

I'm here off & on! We're both still unemployed. I'll soon be looking for a job not in my field just to try to help keep our heads above water..... we're OK yet, but trying to plan is nerve wracking.

Thanks for thinking of me!!!!!!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2003
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 4:24pm
Actually, Depo-Provera (the shot) must be given every 12-13 weeks. Depo is very effective. However, there can be some severe side effects such as weight gain and irregular bleeding. If you do experience unpleasant side effects there is no way of reversing the shot, it must wear off over a three month period.

      Jill

    

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2003
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 7:25pm
Well, I hope things work out soon for you guys. My husband and and I went through a similar experience right after we got married. Ill definately be thinking about you!

Josie