Want your opinion on Ring

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2003
Want your opinion on Ring
7
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 12:03pm
During my usual quarterly "sex talk" with my 16 y/o dd, I told her that is she ever needed birth control to please let me know. Well, she did and know I'm having to deal with all that. For the time being I have my emotions pretty much back under control. I'm trying real hard to focus on what's best for her. I've very thoroughly covered the condom issue for STD prevention and as a back-up birth control method and I'm pretty sure she gets it. We've covered all the committment, religious, etc issues and this is the choice she has made. She and her b/f are as committed to one another as two teens can be and considering I met my DH at age 15, I think they are pretty committed. Now my problem becomes that I don't have a clue about all the methods of birth control available - I had my tubes tied when she was born.

I'm sort of leaning toward the ring but in my reading I keep seeing some horror stories about dizziness, chest tightness, etc. I want to hear from those of you that use this and get your opinion.

I also want to know if you would recommend it to your teen. One of the big pluses to this in my mind is that she would only have to remember once a month. She can't remember to take her ADD medicine and I have to do that for her. I don't want to be so involved in her sexuality that I have to remind her of her birth control on a daily basis. I could handle reminding her once a month. She doesnt' want the patch and I don't want the shot for her.

I'm also concerned about the fact that there isn't any long-term (10 - 20 year) studies on the effects of this. This always concerns me about "new" drugs. Any thoughts on this?

Thanks for your help and support. This is a very difficult time for but I am focusing on the positive - at least she came to me and didn't sneak around (although it would have been alot easier for everyone). Trust with this DD has been a real issue and we've come such a long way that I want to do the very best that I can for her.

Avatar for ilovemyfeet
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 12:37pm
first off i hope me and my childern can have that open of a relationship and feel comfortable talking to eatch other. I wish i could help you out with info about the ring but my Dr put me on the ortho evra patch. he toldm e if i dident like the patch i could come back and get hte ring. so far iv dont good on the patch iv only had trouble with it lifting once. if you want to hear about a patch user experience i can help you out their. best of luck though

julie
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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2003
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 2:03pm
We haven't always been real comfortable talking about this but its just something we bite the bullet and do. I began having real serious talks with her when she and her first b/f had been dating about 4 mos. I just told her that I had something to say and she didn't have to respond but I did expect her to listen. She stared out the window and watched the butterflies or so I thought. I overheard her repeat something I said to a friend a few weeks later and I realized she had heard me. The next talk was a few months later and she stared out the window again. It wasn't until about a year later and a completely different b/f that she began to actually respond - usually with a simple "mom we're not having sex". Each quarter the talk usually had a different theme - physical aspects, committment, religous values (usually tried to throw that one in pretty often), how sex changes the relationship, birth control, etc. I didn't leave my teaching to our quarterly talks either. For instance, one day she mentioned how much like one of her cousins she is and I joked that I hoped she wasn't too much alike b/c the cousin was pregnant with twins when she married at the age of 17. I obviously didn't get the don't have premarital sex message through real clear but I did the best I could. I still feel like I've failed in some ways but I know I did better than my mom did with me and I hope that I've laid a foundation for her to do better with her kids. And I do take some comfort in the fact that her b/f is committed to her (as much as you can be at 18) and they have been together for over a year now. At least I don't think either one of them has made this decision lightly.

She doesn't want the patch b/c she plays a lot of sports and doesn't want it showing in the locker room. Thanks for your support.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 3:56pm
What a difficult discussion....but I too hope that my kids will feel as comfortable talking to me about sex when it's important. And this, in my opinion, is REALLY important.

It's great that you talked to her about using condoms. Teenagers and those in their early 20's are at the biggest risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases out of any age group, the same age group may be also the least disciplined about using them, but obviously that depends on the individual. Condoms condoms condoms!!! You know that and I know that... If you have to, make sure they are both aware of --proper-- condom use, which involves use of a condom before any intimate contact takes place, regardless of the time of the month or other birth control used, --no-- contact without protection. Condoms should be stored away from heat and light and they do have expiration dates, heat, UV radiation, and age will all deteriorate latex.

I agree that the most important part of using hormonal birth control is using it properly, and if you don't think she can remember to take it every day and she won't use the patch, her options are Nuvaring and Depo Provera. Nuvaring is just as reliable as the pill but without a lot of the possibility for user error.

I would not recommend Depo Provera for a teenager in particular because of the strength of the progestin that is used. At least one study has shown that teens exposed to strong progestins may be more likely to develop vulvar vestibulitis, possibly because the genital tissues haven't fully matured on their own. Vulvar vestibulitis isn't something I'd wish on my worst enemy! It's horrible, especially psychologically. The symptoms include painful intercourse, sometimes burning in the genitals, it's truly a life-changing disorder.

I've been using Nuvaring for the last year and 10 months. It couldn't be easier to use and I've had no problems with it. The risk of side effects with the ring is the same as for any hormonal contraceptive. The things you mentioned, the chest tightness and dizziness, those can be caused by any hormonal contraceptive (as well as many other prescription medications), they're not exclusive to the ring. Side effects are less likely with the ring, technically, because the hormone doses are lower than what's in most pills. They're still possible, though, there's no free lunch! The most common side effects with hormonal contraceptives are irregular bleeding at first, nausea, bloating, breast tenderness and maybe mood instability, but usually negative side effects tend to go away after the first couple of months.

I'm not worried about the lack of long-term studies, to be honest. The hormones that are released into the bloodstream are not new to birth control, it's just the location that's different. The progestin in the ring is the first metabolite of desogestrel, and the first pill that I know of to use desogestrel is Desogen. The patent application for Desogen is dated 1992, so this progestin has been around for at least 12 years.

If you want to talk more about it, please feel free! You can either post here or if you want to e-mail me you can (the link is in my profile if you click on my name). I think it's a great thing that you and your daughter are both doing together! Let us know if you need anything, okay?

Judie
Co-cl for Birth Control
Judie Cl for Birth Control 
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2003
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 4:18pm
My mind is racing trying to absorb everything I've read. I know with pills that other drugs (antibiotics) can reduce their effectiveness and was wondering if there is the same problem with the ring. The best accident of my life happened this way but I don't think it would be such a positive experience for my 16 y/o dd. I will ask the md tomorrow but am just trying to get my thoughts together now b/c my DD and I will both be a little nervous tomorrow.

Thanks again!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 5:25pm
Like any other hormonal contraceptives, certain prescription drugs can change the effectiveness of the ring too. If I could suggest something, you might make sure all of her prescriptions are filled at the same pharmacy--the pharmacist should pick up on drug interactions, you can always ask when she gets a prescription from a doctor or pharmacist if it interacts with birth control pills (the reaction happens in either the small intestine or the liver, so whether it's the pill or the ring it doesn't matter).

You mentioned that you feel let down about the premarital sex issue....I think in today's environment it's a lot harder than it's ever been for teenagers to wait. Particularly with a lot of us getting married in our late 20's (I'll be approaching 31 at our wedding), that's a long time to wait! The media and peer pressure don't help, that's for sure. I waited until I was 18. I'm no longer with that guy, but I was with him for 5 years. My fiance was the next, and we'll have been together for 8 years in January, getting married next fall. My mom may have been disappointed if she knew that I'd had sex at 18, but I think she'd agree that everything turned out just fine. I can't imagine that any of this is a result of a parenting mishap, it's just a lot tougher enviroment than it used to be.

Good luck, take a deep breath, and make a list of all your questions before you go! That way you'll make sure you don't forget anything.

Judie
Co-cl for Birth Control
Judie Cl for Birth Control 
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 12:18pm
have you also mentioned to her about a pap smear they probley will want to do one if she is about to become sexual active i know my doctor wont give out birth control with out an annual physical. but i think the ring is the best way to go if she has any side effects she can just take it out and they will go away in a couple of days have you gone to nuvarings website. www.nuvaring.com has alot of info might answer more of your questions. even though she isn't waiting to be married at least she also wont end up pg before marrage too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-11-2004
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 2:40pm

Hi and thanks for being such a