Just Curious!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2004
Just Curious!!!!!
3
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 11:08am
Jill,

Hi, it's Emmer86 here. I have one particular question for you. The last discussion I sent to you was about me and my boyfriend having sex w/out a condom and me being on the Pill. I was scared that I could possibly get pregnant. But a few days after I sent you that discussion I started my period!! But now my question is about one of my best friends and me. My friend is not on birth control at all. She's been thinking about going and getting put on them b/c her and her boyfriend have sex w/out a condom but he pulls out before getting off. My question is, is she more able to get pregnant than me? I have been on the Pill for 6 1/2 months, I take it at 10:00 every night. I'm just really curious! I've asked her if she gets scared and she doesn't. I'm on the pill and I still get scared. Don't get me wrong, my boyfriend does wear a condom sometimes but not all the time. He always pulls out, b/c I see it for myself whenever he gets it all over me. Should I still be scared about myself, or not? And, is there anything that I could say to my friend or not?


Thank You So Much,

Emmer86

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2003
In reply to: emmer86
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 1:26pm
Your friend is MUCH more likely to become pregnant. Guys can have some pre-ejaculation sperm during intercourse that leaks out before and that is enough to cause a pregnancy.

The pill has always worked for me while I was on it. I never became pregnant until we planned it and stopped the BC pills (I was on Ortho-Novum 777). That worked well for us up until now (have a 10yr old, 7yr old, 2 yr old & 10 day old)

Hope that helps.

-bonnie

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2003
In reply to: emmer86
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 1:28pm
Hi emmer86, welcome back!

>> My friend is not on birth control at all. She's been thinking about going and getting put on them b/c her and her boyfriend have sex w/out a condom but he pulls out before getting off. My question is, is she more able to get pregnant than me?

Withdrawal is not an effective means of contraception. In theory it is but in the real world there are too many variables for WD to really be effective. Disadvantages:

- requires great self-control, experience, and trust

- not for men who ejaculate — “come” — prematurely

- not for men who don’t know when to pull out

- not recommended for teens

If you are taking your pills correctly you should be quite safe as the pill is 98-99% effective. In my opinion, your friend is playing bedroom Russian roulette.

>> I'm on the pill and I still get scared. Don't get me wrong, my boyfriend does wear a condom sometimes but not all the time. He always pulls out, b/c I see it for myself whenever he gets it all over me. Should I still be scared about myself, or not?

Hon, there are a lot of women on the pill who don't trust it completely. It's a very personal thing about how much risk you are comfortable with. When I was on OTC for three years I never used back-up unless I was on meds. that might reduce my pills effectiveness and I never had a scare. I was very comfortable with my level of protection, but that's just me. It's quite understandable if you aren't comfortable with yours. Have you considered using a contraceptive sponge in addition to your pills? That way you would have double protection and be able to enjoy him to completion.

>> is there anything that I could say to my friend or not?

If she was my friend I would encourage her to get on an effective form of birth control Pill, patch, ring, or shot so that she wouldn't be at such risk of an unintended pregnancy. All hormonal methods are very effective but she should research which she wants to use as they all have plusses and minuses. As a start, if she has access to the Internet have her read the posts in this boards FAQ section and look at these links: NuvaRing: http://www.nuvaring.com/Consumer/index.asp Ortho Evra: http://www.orthoevra.com/ Planned Parenthood contraceptive choices: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/bc/cchoices.html and PP contraceptive methods effectiveness: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/bc/bcfacts2.html

It’s good to care about ones friends. I hope you can convince her to protect herself effectively. Let us know how you and she doing, ok?

Hugs,

      Jill

    

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: emmer86
Wed, 09-29-2004 - 12:02am
::standing up and waving hands:: Wait a minute! There's more to consider here than just pregnancy!

I know it gets overlooked a lot because they're so much easier to hide, but if your friend (or anybody else) is having sex without a condom, she is also putting herself at risk for sexually transmitted diseases. A lot of times, a man can carry an STD _without_ showing any symptoms and the only way to know for sure if he's clean is to have him go get tested at his friendly neighborhood doctor's office. STD's are nothing to mess around with, while some of them might seem pretty insignificant, some of them can cause infertility, cancer, or death and not all of them are curable. Even in women, some don't show symptoms for a while after infection.

So unless everybody is clean and proven so with test results, condoms are key to preventing what could be a really bad situation.

Judie
Co-cl for Birth Control
Judie Cl for Birth Control