Tubal Litagation question

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Tubal Litagation question
5
Fri, 10-08-2004 - 6:06pm
I need some help from this board please. I am currently 16 wks pregnant with my third child, hubby wants me to get a tubal after the birth. We really dont need more than three children right now. I just dont know if we could afford more. And i have terrible morning sickness to the point where by my 12 wk appt i had lost 15lbs and by my 16wk appt i finally gained 1.5 lbs. My mom is begging me not to get it done, she did and she hates it. Says i will regret it alot, and it will make me have trouble in the future. What should i do?? Anyone got any advice.

Devon mom to 2.5

Audrianna 3 9/18/01

Tristan 22m 12/6/02

Lil one due 3/22/05

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Fri, 10-08-2004 - 6:44pm
Don't get a tubal just because your husband is pressuring you to get one. You need to be absolutely positive that you never want another child. Saying that you don't need more right now isn't the same as saying you're positive you'd never want another one no matter what happens.

If you want long term protection you don't have to worry about, you could always get an IUD. That gives you 5-10 years of protection and lots of time to make sure you never want another child before you make a permanent decision.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 10:04am
Thank you, i think i will talk to my dr about it and think long and hard before i do it. There are a few people on his side of the family that are pressuring me to do it. But i probaly wont

Devon mom to 2.5

Audrianna 3

Tristan 22m

Lil one due 3/22/05

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 11:36am
When you talk to your doctor, make sure you also mention that other people are pressuring you and you aren't sure about it. Women who weren't sure and were pressured by other people tend to have a much higher chance of regretting their decision later. And if you regret a tubal ligation, you're stuck. Reversals may not work, are expensive, and aren't covered by insurance.

Also something to consider. If your husband is the one who is positive that he doesn't want more children, then why doesn't he volunteer to get a vasectomy? Although there are always risks with any surgical procedure, if someone must get surgery, there is less risk involved than a tubal ligation, and it is more effective than a tubal.

If you do decide on sterilization for yourself, then there is a new method called Essure that is nonsurgical, although it may be hard to find a doctor who is performing it yet. But still, make sure you yourself (not just your husband) know without a doubt that you never want another child under any circumstances whatsoever before you get yourself done.

http://www.essure.com/

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2003
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 6:17pm
I am here to tell you that even if you yourself are 100% sure that you don't want anymore children, you still may regret it. I had my daughter and then wanted my tubes tied. I absolutely wanted no more children. So after my son arrived, I had my tubes tied. Believe it or not, I now wish that I hadn't done it. Don't ask me why. From the way you sound, I would not use tubal ligation as your form of birth control. Although I wish I could undo it, I accept that I made my bed and will now have to lie in it.

Good luck with whatever you decide. This is a highly personal decision.

Ann

Lacey 5/01

Nathanial 10/03

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2003
Tue, 10-12-2004 - 9:18am
I have to agree with the rest of the posters. I had a T/L done 6 months ago and I did tons of research on it. While I have not regretted mine 1 second, many women do regret it even though they feel they are done. Being in the middle of a pregnancy is not the time to decide on a permanent solution. I knew that I was done having kids after my first 2 were born but was afraid to get the T/L. When I accidentally ended up pregnant with #3 at the old of 38, I decided it was time to do something permanent this time because I did not want to be 45 and pregnant again. My hubby reluctantly offer to get a V but I did not want to push him in to anything he did not feel comfortable with.

Bottomline, don't even consider it unless you are 110% sure YOU are done having kids, you are at least 35yrs old, and check to see if any other women in your family have had one and had side-effects. My mother and a few other women in my family had a T/L with no effects so I assumed I would probably be ok too. It's a decision not to be taken lightly as it is expensive to reverse and the success rate is poor.

Kay