Always worried...couple questions!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2004
Always worried...couple questions!!
3
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 8:52pm
Hey ladies,

Okay, just a few quick questions from all the expert women on this board. I'm an 18 year old senior in high school. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 1/2 years and have been having sex for the past one. For awhile we relied soley on condoms but (thanks to this board) we now rely on condoms and the birth control pill, OTClo, and spermicides during my "fertile" time of the month, and he pulls out before he ejaculates. Yet, for all the protection we use, at the end of every month, I seem to convince myself that I somehow have gotten pregnant, and usually the only small chance I could be is when he just rubs his penis by my clit or on my vaginal lips, but he never goes in!!! It's so aggrivating because I know I am doing everything I can, but I dream about it everynight, worry about it through every class, and finally I get to the point where I have to go out and buy a pregnancy test just to sleep at night!! Can anyone tell me what the odds are of getting pregnant when using spermicide, condoms and the BCP? And any ways to learn to be less worried?

Thanks so much!

Jess
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2004
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 9:10pm
Wow, honey...I do have to say that your chances of getting pregnant are like...a bazillion to one (not the scientific number ;) But, seriously, your chances of pg are so, so very low, using all of these methods consistently and correctly, that you are well protected against pregnancy.

Here are some individual numbers, when used perfectly:

Birth control pills: 99%

Condoms: 98%

Spermicide: 85%

Withdrawal: 96% (but more like 73% because this one generally is pretty hard...uhm, no pun intended)

From: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/bc/bcfacts2.html

As you can imagine, all of these methods combined, equal an extremely small percentage that leaves for you to get pregnant. The pill by itself is 99% effective - condoms and spermicide and withdrawal really do a great job of making up for that left over 1%.

It seems to me that you`re pretty much doing everything that you can to avoid pregnancy. And as for you using spermicide during your "fertile" times, while on the pill, you really don`t have a "fertile" time because your body doesn`t release an egg to be fertilized. And if he`s pulling out and wearing a condom, that seems pretty redundant, too. BUT! I still commend you for being cautious and taking control of your fertility - I have known way too many teenagers, some of them my friends, who became pregnant because they just didn`t care or weren`t knowledgeable enough to prevent pregnancy.

As for the freaking out about pregnancy...well, after you`ve taken all of these measures, you have to know, logically, that you are extremely, extremely unlikely to become pregnant. After a year, you`ve seen that you haven`t become pregnant. I can tell you that millions of women rely on the pill solely for protection against pregnancy, and many on this board, and have never become pregnant.

If this worry is getting to the point where you can`t sleep, can`t concentrate, and can`t function normally once a month, that`s not healthy for you - stress takes a large toll on your body and can make your monthly bleeding be off schedule. I hate to be a buzz kill, but maybe you need to ask yourself if the enjoyment of sex is worth intense worry that seems to affect every part of your life.


Edited 11/8/2004 9:11 pm ET ET by clannanceilidh

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2003
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 9:31pm
The first poster is right, sweetie. For the seven months that I was on OTClo, I never got pregnant. You don't have to worry about it so much. But it is good to have a backup method if you forget to take your pills every day.

Image hosting by Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2004
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 10:13pm
Thanks girls. It's really great just to have reassuring people who have been around the block, no offense:)! I definitly know where to come if I have more concerns!