Age to Consider Vasectomy
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Age to Consider Vasectomy
| Fri, 04-21-2006 - 6:18pm |
I was wondering at what age a man should consider vasectomy?
When I was 20, I *SO* wanted a vasectomy. I was positive that parenting was not for me. But I was afraid to approach my father for help...I could not have paid for it.
I finally had it done in my late 30's. After I had two kids.
I've been asking myself this question for some time now...what will I do if one of my two kids grows up and asks, "Dad...I'm positive I never wants kids...can you help be get a tubal/vasectomy?"

If your child was so young that they would have to ask you for assistance, then they're probably too young to even get a doctor to perform a sterilization on them.
There are some people who know at a young age that they don't want children and never change their mind, but enough do change their minds later that it might be wise to suggest they use more than one reliable method of birth control in the meantime and then make sure they have adequate time to consider their decision. You yourself wanted a vasectomy at the age of 20 and then later went on to change your mind and have children. If you'd had a vasectomy and then years later wanted children, it's not always so easy to reverse.
I'm 22, and really wish people would be more understanding about the issue. I've been asking for some form of permanent birth control since my first ob/gyn visit at 16. I knew they wouldn't do it that early, but I felt I should go ahead and start my track record, lol. I would not need my mother's financial support to have a procedure.
For men I can imagine it's espcially frustrating since birth control options are very limited, and men can not veto a women's decision in terms of keeping a child.
I think the age is different for everyone, and it's frustrating living in a society that tells you you can't have a procedure because you are essentially not capable of making your own decisions. But considering it would be an elective procedure, I can not imagine asking my mother for financial support, and I doubt she would offer it.
I don't think there is one right age for everyone in making a permanent decision like this.
Susan
To a good Dad,
Amy
I'm curious, what changed your mind about wanting kids? And at your age now, what made you think you didn't want kids back then? Was it the fact that you wanted to play around (have sex) without worrying about getting someone pregnant? (I know for me, that was a reason).
I didn't want kids since I was young, but since everyone said just wait, you'll wnat them, I did. And now that I'm 31, I still dont want kids. I had a TL about two years ago.
If my kid (or neice/nephew) said they didn't want any kids, I'd tell them, "I will help you pay for contraception until you can afford to pay for it yourself. That way, it's 100% your own decision, w/o feeling obligated/pressure/etc from me, the moneyholder"
And if they change their mind, they can adopt. If they REALLY want their own kid, but can't (reversal doesn't work), well, that's life, welcome to making decisions when you're young. If they never change their mind. Great.
So, at 29, was I too young? Even though I've known I've NEVER wanted kids since I was 13? Maybe younger?
Of course, the irony is that many people in their 20's decide to *have* children, which is actually a much more permanent decision. If you have a vas or TL, you can always adopt or attempt a reversal. If you have kids, you can't really give them away. (Well, you could, but you'd be a social pariah!)
Permanent steralization should only be undertaken after serious consideration, but it should be available for anyone over 18, male or female, who chooses it.