How to deal with my mother...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2008
How to deal with my mother...
Mon, 06-01-2009 - 11:39pm

I am pretty concerned about how I will have to deal with my mother after my son is born (any day now) and as he grows.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2006
Tue, 06-02-2009 - 3:45pm

That's hard. Your mom, and other religious people, feel just as strongly about their beliefs as we do about ours. And they feel that their grandchildren will suffer not know what they know. So you can see how much they "need" to "educate" our children.

I think keeping that in mind, talk to her gently. Have a sit down conversation with her and tell her different people have different beliefs and that your beliefs are different from hers. Ask her to please respect that and to allow yourself to educate your child.

FWIW, I allow my kids to attend church with my MIL. I do it cringing, especially when my DD comes home with bible stories, but for me it's a sacrifice to keep the peace. BUT I also have conversations with my DD about what I believe and that she will decide for herself when she's bigger.

Good luck!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2006
Tue, 06-02-2009 - 11:23pm

Kmarch, welcome to our board.
We all came with with the same questions for raising our children, I think!
The road to raising a freethinking child is a long one. But one that is well worth it. You will teach them discernment, logic, joy, and freedom from guilt. At some point they will be taken to the homes and hearts of loved ones with other belief systems and, sometimes, they will be confused.
Your open and loving heart and your clear and consistent explanations for things will be your child's port in the storm!

So, don't worry too much and trust in your own abilities to raise a thinking child!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2004
Thu, 06-04-2009 - 10:49pm


I think the best thing you can do is be open, honest, and lay down some ground rules.