Had A Rough Day
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| Tue, 11-18-2003 - 8:48pm |
My meds are causing me problems. The trileptal was just increased to 300 mgs (nowhere near a therapeutic dose) and I was soooo spacey today, my stomach hurt, I kept going tot he bathroom, I was dizzy and lightheaded. I started to freak out b/c I really felt sick. I went to the gym tonight eventhough that was the LAST thing that I wanted. I really wanted to just go home and sleep. But I went anyway, and surprisingly, I had one of my best squat workouts. I squatted heavier than I have in 2 months and it felt great. So despite my lightheadedness, I did well. However, a HUGE HUGE wave of despair and depression overcame me. I skipped my abs and calves and when I got to my car, my eyes overflowed with tears and I started crying hysterically. I feel like such a pathetic failure.
I see my pdoc and therapist tomorrow, thank goodness. It couldn't have come at a better time.
Anyway, I just needed to come here and vent and let someone know that I'm wasn't ok today. I hope everyone else had a good day.
Christina

I can't imagine how you felt seeing your comptetitors names on the list and knowing that yours should be on there, too.
All I can say is that when you finally do get there, and I know that you will, you can feel all that much more pride in knowing how much harder you had to work to get there.
Please take care. I am sending you big hugs.
Pamela
I am not in a real good place right now, but wanted to send you a huge cyber hug! You really are a wonderful person. Hang in there sweetie!!!
((((((((((((((((((((((CHRISTINA))))))))))))))))))))))
Foggy