Think I need mega support now
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| Sat, 11-22-2003 - 6:45pm |
CL-Jenn I think I read your post a little too early today, but thank you for my gold stars. Also, thank you to everyone who replied to my post.
The good news here is I've been able to squelch the noise today. The bad news is the way that came about.
The day started out good. But my life changed forever at 1:00 p.m. when the call came in that my father had passed away. There's just so much I want/need to say and have no idea where to begin. My "role" in this family is to be the "ROCK", well the rock is crumbling. I don't know what I'm feeling right now other than a whole bunch of different things. I have a very wrestless feeling inside to do something and haven't got the first clue as to what it is. I'm trying to focus on what NEEDS to be done right now and am having a really hard time with that. I spinning in circles and need to stop and focus. I'm getting very frustrated with myself and this blasted illness. I have a lot of "should'a,could'a, woulda's" running through my mind while trying to focus on the details of what has to be done.
Thanks for listening and I'm sorry if my thoughts didn't come out making any sense. I'm not thinking to straight right now.
Foggy



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I am so very sorry for your loss. I know you will find the strength and courage to get through this.
Everything that you are feeling is normal for someone who has just experienced and sudden and devastating loss. Don't be so hard on yourself. Take care of what needs to be done for YOU to keep yourself together first. Don't be afraid to ask family and friends in this very difficult time. You are only human and can't always be the "rock" forever. It's ok to lean on others for support and let them know you aren't doing so well. You can still be strong while occasionally falling apart. It's our ability to "bounce back" and stand up against adversity and keep trying that makes us stronger.
I don't know if you are in the right frame of mind to absorb anything I wrote. I know better than anyone how difficult it is to absorb the positives when you are in a very bad place emotionally.
Again, I'm sorry for your loss and you and your family are in my thoughts.
Christina
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