Depression and relationships
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Depression and relationships
| Mon, 11-24-2003 - 10:04am |
Hello
I am having a problem with my relationship with my boyfriend and depression. Sometimes I get a little blue and I am down for a day or two then I am ok again. Well for the last few days, I have been MISERABLE. I can't even stand to be around myself. The problem is, I moved a few months ago for a promotion with my job. Well my boyfriend and I are now three hours apart and we are only getting to see each other on the weekends. Since this is a holiday week, we both too vacation so we could spend the week together and have some quality time. When I got there on Saturday, I was so down, that I didn't even want to be around him. I had warned him that I was feeling blue before I left to go to his house. He insisted that I come visit any how. Needless to say, I came home yesterday. We were out for a nice walk in the woods and I broke down and couldn't stop crying. I felt bad for him, becasue I couldn't explain that he didn't do anything to me, but I couldn't say what the exact cause was either. He is the kind of person that likes short to the point answers.
He and I talked about it for a while and I told him that I wanted him to camping with his buddies who had invited him to spend the week with them and that we would get together later in the week when we both came home for Thanksgiving. He is going tohis mom's and I am going to mine, but I get Friday off so I asked him if we could still get together for the weekend. He said that would be good and he would call me. well now I am worried that he isn't going to call. He was supposed to call me yesterday and let me know he made it tot he camp site ok, but he didn't.
I was wondering if I should worry and what I can do to make him understand that what is wrong with me is not his fault and that I want our relationship to be as strong as it was before the tear fest yesterday.
I am having a problem with my relationship with my boyfriend and depression. Sometimes I get a little blue and I am down for a day or two then I am ok again. Well for the last few days, I have been MISERABLE. I can't even stand to be around myself. The problem is, I moved a few months ago for a promotion with my job. Well my boyfriend and I are now three hours apart and we are only getting to see each other on the weekends. Since this is a holiday week, we both too vacation so we could spend the week together and have some quality time. When I got there on Saturday, I was so down, that I didn't even want to be around him. I had warned him that I was feeling blue before I left to go to his house. He insisted that I come visit any how. Needless to say, I came home yesterday. We were out for a nice walk in the woods and I broke down and couldn't stop crying. I felt bad for him, becasue I couldn't explain that he didn't do anything to me, but I couldn't say what the exact cause was either. He is the kind of person that likes short to the point answers.
He and I talked about it for a while and I told him that I wanted him to camping with his buddies who had invited him to spend the week with them and that we would get together later in the week when we both came home for Thanksgiving. He is going tohis mom's and I am going to mine, but I get Friday off so I asked him if we could still get together for the weekend. He said that would be good and he would call me. well now I am worried that he isn't going to call. He was supposed to call me yesterday and let me know he made it tot he camp site ok, but he didn't.
I was wondering if I should worry and what I can do to make him understand that what is wrong with me is not his fault and that I want our relationship to be as strong as it was before the tear fest yesterday.
Any thoughts will be greatly appericated. I feel better just writing all this down.
Christy

Depression is such a hard thing to understand. When someone hasn't dealt with depression, no matter how understanding they are, they just can't understand it. I often tell people that it's like I have a flu in my brain that won't go away.
Anyway, I hope to get to know you better. Stick around, there are lots of great women here.
Pamela
Christy
I want to start first by saying not to worry if your boyfriend hasnt called you from his camp site if he has a cell phone he may not get service where he is and that is why he may not have called.
When you are in a relationship and one suffers from depression and the other has never been around it before it can be tough for the one who hasnt dealt with it before to fully understand what is going on or how to help the other and can often sometimes feel so helpless when it comes to trying to be there for the person adn they tend to ge frustrated with it all not knowinf what to do. Although we being the ones suffering from the illness try to make others understand they never full will understand how bad it can be others say the get it but they dont.
Try to give your boy friend a little insight something that may help him help you to be there for you you sound like you both love each other very much too much to give in and give up.
Good luck sweety and hang in there things will work out in your favor dont worry or at least try not to worry.
Erin