Struggling today -pos trg

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Registered: 11-18-2003
Struggling today -pos trg
7
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 10:21am
I am really having a hard time today. I have to find an attorney to discuss my dad's estate, had to cancel doctor's appointments, all the "business" type stuff. When I began these tasks I put my "business hat" on so I could get through it, but it didn't work too well. I have to go back to his apt. today to finish packing it up because my sis is going tomorrow to get the furniture so the place can be emptied out. I hope I'm able to finish today what I started yesterday.

People I've seen and talked to over the past couple of days have all asked "Is there anything I can do?". All I want to say is "Yeah, you can give me back my dad." But I just smile and say "No, but thank you anyway." The fact is, I don't know myself if there's anything anyone CAN do. This is all very new to me.

Thanks for listening.

Foggy

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 10:27am
(((((foggy)))))

Have you thought about maybe delegating some stuff that can be done by someone else? It might help. Maybe if someone asks, you can ask if they can help with house work, meals etc. I know it might be hard to ask, but sometimes it just has to be done. And people want to help during this terribly hard time.

I am sending you hugs, Traci.

Pamela

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 10:35am
(((Foggy))Of course it's new to you. And it's perfectly normal to be down at a time like this. Just try to do the best you can, and don't be afraid to ask for help.

Hugs to you.........Ilka



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Registered: 02-05-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 11:52am
Oh sweetie...

Just know that you CAN and WILL get through all of this. I'm so sorry for your loss as well. I've been thinking about you. I haven't had to deal with all of this as far as finding an attorney and all of that stuff, but lord knows I've had to deal with death and related issues long enough to know that it's not fun. Even though you had to cancel your appt. with the doctor, know that we're all here to listen. Take care, and you're in my thoughts and prayers!

Trixie

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 12:10pm


I have experianced death alot in my life a litle too much for my liking.

I am not close yo my dad at all I really dont even know him so I can not relate really to what you are going through and I am sorry for that.

I know that when my aunt died back in 1995 I was devistated I couldnt function she basically raised me since I was a baby she was my world I loved her more than my own mother but people asked all the time what could they do finally I got to the breaking point there was nothing anyone could do or say that would bring her back to me.

I dealt with it by talking to her going to her grave telling her things that I couldnt tell anyone who was living and it made me feel better sometimes I swear it felt like she was higging me I still miss her so much and it still hurts like it was just yesterday that it all happened. I got through and you will also get through it.

Let yourself grieve as best you can we each grieve in outr won way just make sure you grieve or it will come back to bite you in the butt if you dont.

I wish that I could be there to help you I do know how hard it is do clean up and pack up someones life and put it in boxes but you will be okay.

My thoughts are with you always be strong for yourself but also dont be afraid to be weak you dont always have to be the rock let someone else be that for a while.

take care of yourself.

Erin

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 12:39pm
Thank you all for your replies. I just got off the phone with my "case manager". I called her to see what I should do about the group session tonight. She said that for a distraction it would be good, but that it wouldn't be somewhere to get into what all's been going on w/ me lately. So I now have yet another decision to add to my list. I'm not in a real good place right now. Today is harder to deal with dad's passing than the past 2 days. I just don't know what direction I'm heading in. I called my work yesterday and told them I wouldn't be there today. Called back this morning to find out about bereavment leave. They offer 3 options. Use sick leave, personal leave, or take it unpaid. My sick leave is about gone, I use my personal leave to pick up where sick leave runs out and I can't afford to take it unpaid. So, today and the day of the service is the only time I can really afford to take off. I'm just very lost right now. Thanks for your input. It does mean a lot to me.

Foggy

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2007
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 9:18pm

(((((Foggy))))), I'm so sorry about your loss.

 

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CL-ladybug987

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 11:38pm
All I can do is send you some more cyber hugs. You just have to get through this somehow, just like I have to.



Ruth,


Single Mommy to


Ruth, Single Mom to

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