Feeling guilty for taking meds

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2003
Feeling guilty for taking meds
3
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 3:33pm
I just don't know what's wrong with me! Last week I felt so miserable and low that I was desperate for my doc to prescribe meds. Now I've been on Lexapro for a week, and I am actually starting to notice a difference already. I don't feel that all consuming fatigue and despair that I was feeling, and I'm not able to focus on only the negative feelings, like I was before. I should be happy for this, right? Instead I am just feeling guilty that I wanted to take meds so bad and I feel weak for not being strong enough to bring myself out of the depression without them. I feel guilty because I know I'll need to take them for several months, but we really can't afford this right now. I'm scared that the depression will come back once I quit them and that I will never beat depression for good. I feel bad because I guess I was expecting the meds to be some kind of magical cure that would make me happy and make me more outgoing and not want to avoid people all the time, but now I realize that I'm the only one who can make that happen and I don't know if I can do that. I am seeing a therpist, which I can't really afford either, but I dread going to therapy because it seems to just reinforce my fears. I guess I was looking for a quick solution, and now I realize this will be a very long, expensive process. I want to be happier for my family's sake, but so far I'm not feeling very hopeful that my attitude will change much. Maybe I am just weak or I'm just feeling sorry for myself, but I don't know how to think any differently. I guess I thought the meds would help that, but while they are helping with some things, they are causing new problems for me to deal with that affect my family, like bad headaches and feeling kind of spaced out a lot of the time. I still feel irritable and still have insomnia and I'm still not experiencing any enjoyment from things. I realize that meds are not a cure-all and that I haven't taken them long enough to notice a significant difference yet, but I'm afraid that things will never change and I'm starting to regret taking them in the first place. I just feel like there is no way to end depression forever. Has anyone ever had long term success with meds? Well, thanks for letting me vent.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 3:47pm
(((moodrew)))

I have been on Paxil for a long time, and they do help. I am in the process of going to a higher dose, so I am getting headaches as well. But they do go away. Keep on your meds, the side effects will go away sweetie.

You are not weak, nor are you feeling sorry for yourself. I think you'd be surpised at how many people are on them, and others never know.

I have resigned myself to knowing that I will be on meds for a really long time. I have been on them steady for six years now. And on and off before that for a few years. I just need the help that they provide. I am lucky, though. I have coverage through work, they cover 80% of my meds which is a big help when my Paxil $107 a month!

Meds help, but you are right when you say that there is a whole lot of other stuff to be worked on. Talking with someone is a great help.

Take care

Pamela

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 3:49pm

((((((((((((((((((((((Sweetie))))))))))))))))))))


The first thing that is important to remember about meds is that they can up to 6-8 weeks to have their full effect.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 4:55pm


dO NOT FEEL GUILTY ABOUT TAKING MEDS YOU ARE WORTH TAKING THEM AND THEY ARE MAKING YOU FEEL BETTER SO PLEASE DONT FEEL BAD ABOUT FEELING BETTER FEEL GOOD ABOUT FEELING BETTER.

I USED TO TAKE LAMICTAL AND IT WORKED SO GREAT FOR ME I LOVED IT BUT GOT A NASTY RASH FROM IT SO I HAD TO STOP NOW I AM IN A VERY DARK PLACE BUT THAT IS BECAUSE MY NEW MEDS ARE NOT DOING IT FOR ME IT HAS BEEN TWO MONTHS AND NOTHING BUT KEEP UP WITH THE LEXAPRO I USED IT BUT WAS ALWAYS FALLING ASLEP AT OWRK AND EVERYTHING AND IT SEEMS TO BE HAVING SO FAR A GREAT EFFECT ON YOU.

SO DO NOT FEEL BAD ABOUT THE MEDS JUST LIKE TRAC SAID DIABETICS TAKE INSULIN AND DONT FEEL BAD ABOUT IT WELL NEITHER SHOULD YOU, AT ONE POINT I HATED TAKING MEDS NOW I WOULD GIVE ANYTHING TO FIND ONE THAT WORKS FOR ME.

KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK AND THINGS WILL ONLY GET BETTER FOR YOU

GOOD LUCK