well can't seem find a pdoc *triggers*
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| Mon, 11-24-2003 - 9:47pm |
My tdoc is being really sweet and trying so hard to find me a 'consultant' pdoc. My current pdoc said to go ahead and get a second opinion. Her only advice today was for me to be hospitalized - and plz do not take this the wrong way - NO THIS IS NOT AN OPTION. Although she keeps bringing it up.
The best pdoc in Northern Va is taking patients, but he's $275 for the first visit and doesn't take ANY insurance.
The next three aren't taking new patients.
The last is taking new patients - sorta - I can have an appointment in February.
I can see someone at WRAMC - I'm a military dependent, at least until my STBX gets his divorce - in mid December...but are they gonna be any different than the one I'm seeing at Fort Belvoir? There's NO WAY to see anyone in the military system on an acute basis. Either you are hospitalized and they sorta pay attention to you, or you wait and see them for 20 minutes once every 4 - 6 weeks.
And I've been through this before...just to get this very nice, overworked and underpaid contract pdoc at the Fort Belvoir clinic.
I'm just soooo tired of fighting. I take my meds when they don't work, I go to therapy (and at least my tdoc seems to care), I go to my med appointments.
And the pdoc seems to think its not that serious. Basically I need to shoot my head off before someone will notice how miserable I am. I'm supposed to hang around how many more weeks like this? I'm drinking (but can't seem to get drunk) when I haven't in more than 3 years. I slashed up my arm and chest more than I ever have before.
This latest episode is now 2 years & 7 months old.
All my pdoc could say to that is I seem to be very patient.
I'm just want...no more stuff no more pain, no kids, no responsibilities and no more professionals telling me how high functioning and patient I am. My mind is falling apart, really...and no one seems to notice.
I want to stop hurting.
Hugs,
KarenMRH

Sweetie,