Handled things poorly?
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Handled things poorly?
| Sat, 11-29-2003 - 8:54pm |
I'm worried that I've sent the 'wrong message' to my kids over the past week.
| Sat, 11-29-2003 - 8:54pm |
I'm worried that I've sent the 'wrong message' to my kids over the past week.
Best,
Amy
Sorry its taken me so long to write but in one week I hit a parked tractor and the next day got a ticket for no setbelt. Then I proceeded to get Thanksgiving preparations under way. I started the night before got to moms at 11am who I had dressed for the day and got her breakfast and lunch only to have her sleep fromm 11am til 4pm. Could have cooked the whole dam dinner at my house but I thought she would enjoy having people around. I can't bitch though dinner was a success and it will probably be her last family gathering. I know this because her emphysema is getting the upper hand now.
By the way just wanted you to know it was my son who got in the accident I was just taking the rap for him. You see he just got his permit and my hubby has been a bit uptight so I told my son I would take the blame. He has been so cute worrying and checkin in with me and I said Thomas yes we will tell dad but maybe in a couple years.
~~~~~~~~~~Well Hon ~~~~one Day At A time~~~~lov Amy~~~~~Friend Always ~~~~~~~~
Take care!
Trixie
Hi foggy!
Sorry things are soo hard right now, and I know grief is a really difficult thing because everyone goes thru the process differently and at different times..
I had a suggestion though, I know I have read about it and seen it advertised here in VT but have you considered looking into a grief program for you and your family.. Sometimes they offer things like a weekend retreat where you all can go and talk things out with counselors or just find ways to express your feelings with other families going thru the same thing. I hear its very cathartic.
You could contact your local hospital about programs like this..
I understand totally how you feel hun,, I grew up in a "hold it all in" type of family too.. I wasnt allowed to cry when My grandfather died because being the oldest (13 at the time) my Mother said it would upset my younger brother and sister.. didnt matter that it messed me up for years not being able to grieve.
Sending lots of support your way!
*hugs
*hugs
Foggy;
I agree with the other women, on the fact that you are doing the best you can in the situation.
Blessed Be!
Laure-co-cl on migraines & headaches
(((((((((((((((((((((((((foggy)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I know where you are coming from with the dont feel trust ect.... thing I grew up the same way well not exactly the same way different households family ect..but the alcoholism runs in my family like water.
Grwoing up we didnt talk about how grandma drank and beat my mom aunt and uncle or how my grandfather worked way too much so he wouldnt have to deal with it, or how my dad left us high and dry and really screwed my mom over and messed up my head and my sisters head and how my dad drank so much that he would not come home I was way too young to remember those things but my sister does.
So we just sisnt talk about it those were words that were wispered but those wispers where very loud too loud.
So my mom never really showed love I know that she loves my sister very much me well I came at a bad time parents were seperated ect.....so I was different I am not saying that my mom didnt want me but I came at the highest point of stress in her life so what she couldnt do for me my aunt did but anyways I dont want to get into my family this is about you.
What I am trying to say is this I held so much in growing up emotions that I wanted and needed to express were bottled up and stayed bottled up until that bottle exploded.
you cant change you right now but you can tell your kids thats its okay let them see you cry talk with your oldest about your dad maybe if she sees you showing emotion she will see that it is okay for her to show emotion or maybe she cries when she is alone that way her younger siblings dont have to see it.
I know how hard it is to always have to be the stong one I was not the strong one at all but my sister was and now she has learned to not be she is still my rock but she knows now when to be strong and when to let someone be strong for her.
I know I was probably no help what so ever and I am sorry, I have way too much energy these past few days and I tend to babble sorry.
I will think more of ways to help you but in the meantime I will be thinking of you and sending you nothing but good vibes and positive thoughts.
Erin