How can i make my husband get help
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| Thu, 12-04-2003 - 9:09pm |
this is my first time to post so "Hello" to you all. I'm hoping someone out there can help me with this dilemma. My sister is married to a man who has all the classic signs of depression. He lost his mom in the past year to cancer and also got married to my sister. My sis was diagnosed with depression/anxiety and is on meds. My BIL has had suicidal thoughts in the past, especially during and after his moms sickness and death. He says he's depressed because my sis is depressed, and vice versa. He is tired all the time, never seems to have money although they both make good money, since being married they have had relations 3 times (since April). Etc., etc.
I have a history of depression and I am Bipolar, so I have some understanding of the situation. However, I'm not sure how to get someone help when they think they are AOK. I know that I was the same way before I was diagnosed, but my situation enabled me to get help easier. I didn't have to ask for it, I was shown a video by my OBGYN after giving birth at the urging of my daughters pediatrician. It gave me a lot of insight as to what I had been dealing with all my life. I thought that's just how I was and that if others did not like it they could just leave. This is my BIL's attitude.
How can I help my sister get help for her husband? I suggested that she talk to her own psychiatrist. In the hopes that she could better deal with him if he still refuses to talk to someone. He really needs to get help soon, because he has mentioned taking his own life recently.
If anyone can give me some insight i would really appreciate it. I can be reached on the board or at angieo_76082@yahoo.com.

I don't know how you get someone with mental illness to get help if they don't see they have a problem or see it but won't accept it. No more than you can get an alcoholic or drug addict to get help if they don't want to. I do, however, wish you and your sister all the best in your growth and treatment and hopefully the professional people you see can direct both of you how to handle getting him to at least be seen once. Keep us posted on how you are doing and I wish again I could be of more help. I usually search on the internet for things I need help with. Maybe you can look up "How to get someone with depression to get help"
GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!!
Tina
Thanks so much for responding to my question. You helped very much. I went to the bookstore this evening and browsed through the Psych section to see if I could find anything. Everything said to be patient, get help for yourself in order to better deal with it, etc. It's a shame that something horrible has to happen before we can help the person. I am so very sorry about the loss in your family! I can't imagine the pain that your family went through. My heart goes out to you.
If you ever need anyone to talk to about BiPolar, I also have a lot of insight in that area. I'm stable at the moment on meds, but I seem to be sliding down a little the last couple of days. I do so dread the depressive times, so I'm trying my best to stay positive and think good thoughts. Hope it works!
Take care,
Angie