What's the worst part?

Avatar for legs2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
What's the worst part?
45
Sat, 12-06-2003 - 8:40am
All, I would like some insight into this thing called depression. It makes me feel less alone to ask questions like this, so bear with me.

I have been thinking about this illness we deal with. I have been in many studies and it is good in that I am contributing to the data about how to fix us and it is bad in that it often open wounds.

Things associated with depression:

Fatigue

Hopelessness

Sadness

Worthlessness

Lack of appetite

Becoming less social

Sighing, yawning

Unable to fulfil daily activities

Memory issues

Motivational problems

Apathetic-ness

Loss of sex drive

Lethargy

Crying

Feelings life is not worth living

Getting easily aggitated

Restlessness

Too much sleep

Too little sleep

Wow, no wonder diagnosis is hard. (My apologies for poor spelling too)(Maybe that is the depression...nope...just a poor speller...lol)

So here is my question. If you have read this far.

What is the worst part for you?

I am not fond of being a member of the "who needs a shower? " club.

I hate that I used to be an up person, who was positive all the time and now....

I hate that I used to always get the little things done..

I hate that I have to force myself to eat every darn morsel of food that I take in...

But this is me...I will post my worst part in a seperate post.

What is the worst part for you?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
Mon, 12-08-2003 - 5:52pm
I have to vote with the fatigue and too little sleep. Usually if I can get restorative sleep at night for at least 8 hours, I'm good to go the next day. But if I can't get into delta....I'm beat the next day and trying to achieve it all day long, while I'm awake...lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Mon, 12-08-2003 - 6:24pm


good question....

I hate the fact that I used to have such an infectious laugh and now I fight to hear it once again.

I hate that I get annoyed with people and things way too easily.

I hate the fact that I dont have nearly enough energy and that it has dropped so much so fast in the time that I had gotten so depressed.

I hate the fact that I hate me.

I hate the fact that I live in fear.

but as you this isnt even the worst of it

Avatar for legs2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 12-08-2003 - 9:08pm
(((((Erin))))) I think it is a very good answer. That is the pervading feeling from all the answers is that all of the "worst" parts are so related. It is hard to pull it all apart. So your answer is completely valid and really what a lot of the other ladies were saying.

You are yet again brilliant.

Thanks for your answer.

Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.

Take care,

Lisa-)

Avatar for legs2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 12-08-2003 - 9:17pm
(((((Karen)))))) "Noise"...I love the way you put that. It is true, the noise and the unpredicatable nature of this illness are horrible. The "shoulds" of our lives are difficult without depression, much less with it.

I liked your post. It made sense to me, but we are in the same boat. lol

Thanks for answering.

Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.

Take care,

Lisa-)

Avatar for legs2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 12-08-2003 - 9:30pm
(((((Becca))))))) It had never occurred to me that apathy was at the root of the "no shower" club. Or at the root of my not being able to eat. But you are right....always takes a friends perspective to kick you in the butt. Good one.

Thanks for your answer.

Come visit more often, if school will allow. We miss you...well...I do.

Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.

Take care,

Lisa-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
Tue, 12-09-2003 - 5:27am

Lisa;


What a great, thought-provoking question!!


For me, the worst part is the "inertia"-great word Barb! And the apathy.

Blessed Be!

Laure-co-cl on migraines & headaches

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2007
Tue, 12-09-2003 - 11:14am
Hi, (((((((Laure))))))), you might want to mention the yawning to your psychiatrist.

 

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CL-ladybug987

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
Tue, 12-09-2003 - 1:43pm

(((((((((Barb)))))))))


Thanks so much for that info!!

Blessed Be!

Laure-co-cl on migraines & headaches

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2007
Tue, 12-09-2003 - 1:52pm

((((((((Laure)))))))), I forget when your meds were changed.

 

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CL-ladybug987

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2003
Tue, 12-09-2003 - 9:31pm
I have to agree with you foggy. The worst part of depression for me is definitely the feelings of worthlessness and the complete lack of motivation. But interesting enough is the peculiar way that all the symptoms associated with depression seem to be in one way or another the worst part at any given time. Depending on what day it is, what I feel like when I get up in the morning, what someone might say to me, can trigger any one of the many things that make dealing with life and living it so hard. I find my self in a state of frustration and confusion about it all frequently, but I know deep inside that there is a light at the end of this dark tunnel I'm in and somehow and some way I will finally get to it.

Jaime