In constant fear
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In constant fear
| Sat, 12-06-2003 - 9:03am |
Hello, I found this site while I was searching the web for help.I'm not sure that this type of service will be able to help ,but I want to try.
I have sufferd from depression in the past and was taking Zoloft for it with great results except for decreased sexual desire. I picked up a book called the "Power Of Now"
it was excellent and it inspired me read more books on the mind and the nature of our being and eventually I became interested in Yoga ,Zen and meditative silent illumination.
My studies have helped me, with devotion and time I gained an understanding of how our misconceived expectations , desires, attachment and an incorrect veiw of things make us upset,frustrated, sad and depressed. I have helped many of my freinds and some co-workers with there problems with a good deal of success. My wife and I were at the bank the other week and we found out Linda our bank manager was going through a divorce and was highly upset and confused.She told us a few things about the situation and how her husband had walked out for a younger woman and about things that he was saying to hurt her. I told her that the things that he was saying and what he had done to her do not define her but only define himself and with that I could see her face light up it.My point is a correct understanding of things can help.
Now I wonder If anyone can give me advice
A few months back I woke up in the middle of the night with a feeling of complete dread
I was shaking and began crying, I felt utterly scared of losing my wife and I felt that if I did lose her it would be the end. I couldn't stop shaking and I had this feeling of
dread and sickness deep within me for about two weeks then it went away and I thought of how silly I was because lots of people have such strong attachments.
Now it's several months later and the feeling of dread and deep sadness mixed with the fear of losing my wife that I have been with for 25 years is now almost constantly with me
and has been so for about a week. I can't take this and I can't explain how bad I feel
I understand that lose is hard for everyone, but for me not to be able to live my life now because of fearing lose in the future is not right, I can't shake this..it's not thought it's feeling. If it was thought I could beat itwith intellectual understanding.
Do I need to go on anti-depresents again. Please Help I feel so sick inside
I have sufferd from depression in the past and was taking Zoloft for it with great results except for decreased sexual desire. I picked up a book called the "Power Of Now"
it was excellent and it inspired me read more books on the mind and the nature of our being and eventually I became interested in Yoga ,Zen and meditative silent illumination.
My studies have helped me, with devotion and time I gained an understanding of how our misconceived expectations , desires, attachment and an incorrect veiw of things make us upset,frustrated, sad and depressed. I have helped many of my freinds and some co-workers with there problems with a good deal of success. My wife and I were at the bank the other week and we found out Linda our bank manager was going through a divorce and was highly upset and confused.She told us a few things about the situation and how her husband had walked out for a younger woman and about things that he was saying to hurt her. I told her that the things that he was saying and what he had done to her do not define her but only define himself and with that I could see her face light up it.My point is a correct understanding of things can help.
Now I wonder If anyone can give me advice
A few months back I woke up in the middle of the night with a feeling of complete dread
I was shaking and began crying, I felt utterly scared of losing my wife and I felt that if I did lose her it would be the end. I couldn't stop shaking and I had this feeling of
dread and sickness deep within me for about two weeks then it went away and I thought of how silly I was because lots of people have such strong attachments.
Now it's several months later and the feeling of dread and deep sadness mixed with the fear of losing my wife that I have been with for 25 years is now almost constantly with me
and has been so for about a week. I can't take this and I can't explain how bad I feel
I understand that lose is hard for everyone, but for me not to be able to live my life now because of fearing lose in the future is not right, I can't shake this..it's not thought it's feeling. If it was thought I could beat itwith intellectual understanding.
Do I need to go on anti-depresents again. Please Help I feel so sick inside

Welcome to the board.
The advice that you gave me sounds great and I am going to follow it.
I had a physical for a life insurance policy just last month and I'm in excellent physical condition, but the suggestion that you gave for cognitive therapy was also suggested to me by a research Dr. in NYC. He gave me a link to the Acadamy of Cognitive Therapy.After I read your reply I sent an e-mail right to make an appointment but first I am going to take your suggestion and see my family Dr.
Thank you very much. You have wisdom and a good heart.
DC
Some of the treatments used are:
Certain serotonin-related drugs
Behavioral therapy requires the individual to be highly motivated to resist the obsessive thoughts.
Cognitive therapy
I hope this is of some help to you.
Also, out of the scientific relm and into the more spiritual: It is my understanding that if a premonition is to be true, it will happen within a 48 hr. period, following the premonition. So if it's been over 48 hours, you can let it go as being a "fear".
Blessings.
Edited 12/8/2003 11:06:42 AM ET by n2ishn
It is not a premonition but it is like you said obsessive thinking..recurring negitive thoughts over time. I took half a 50 mg of Zoloft and I'm going to take another half tonight then I will start taking the whole 50 mg per day after on.
I really thought I could beat this depression with my mind and a correct understanding thats why I stoped my zoloft about a year ago, but this is my second bad spell since. Thank you for writing it has been helpful info that you provided and it's even extremley heart warming just to communicate with people that understand, especially ones who are so knowledgable
Thanks again , Doug.
I get a thought in my head about my husband leaving me and it takes over my every thought. Bringing on my already diagnosed anxiety attacks.
I talk to him about it but I do feel very embarrased, after repeating my fear over and over. How do you explain to someone that isnt leaving you....that "I know your gonna leave me"?
I was off antidepressants for awhile..thought "Good for me, I beat it" and then I needed them again and thought. "Why cant I be normal, I should be able to deal with things just like NORMAL people"
I put down myself for not handling life as anyone else would. But with time and therapy I realized I have an imbalance..I really do..!! Wow did I give myself a break when I finally believed that!
So anyways..I feel you..I understand..and as my therapist once said in describing to my husband what my anxiety feels like. "Her body is responding as if a tiger is chasing her, even though there is no tiger" hence the shaking..cant breathe..and honest to goodness horrid fear.
Take it easy on yourself..share your wonderful knowledge of how to relax in here PLEASE!!!! lol and have a wonderful Holiday!
L
Yes I do believe that I have a chemical imbalance, I don't feel bad or inferior because I have this imbalance. I just really wanted to beat this thing intellectually, but I gave it a reall ggod try but now I must go back on Zoloft. That anology about the Tiger was very much defined the way I was feeling. I'm feeling better now.I'm not sure if the depression and anxiety just finished it's cycle with me or if the zoloft That I've only been taking for two days kicked in(is it possible for it to have an effect that quickly?)
Im am very sure all the good advice I have recieved in un hepl me greatly and just talking with others that experience similar feeelings makes me feel not so alone.
Thank you much.
I have had prozac help me within a week..and the doctors all say no way it takes 3 to 4 weeks.
Glad your feelin better...
Have a great dane!!!!!!
L