I need to slow down, off balance- help

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
I need to slow down, off balance- help
4
Tue, 12-09-2003 - 1:37pm
Hi Everyone!

I have been pressuring my bf of 2 years to marry me now. My insecurities of being alone and financial stress in my life are overpowering me. I guess it is the bipolar, I don't know. I get so obsessed with wanting to control everything and making things happen right now. My bf is working at his new bussiness and he has millionares on his side helping him get his bussiness rolling. He has a great reputation with them. He explaines to me how this all takes time but that I need to have faith in him and be patient. I want to and I do good for awhile and then I get back to the urgency again. I don't want to mess up my relationship. I want to show him support and show him I have faith in him. He has told me he loves me and I am the one, the only one he ever wants. He says we will have a comfortable life, that he he is working at it but he can't do it overnight. Logically I understand this and that is why I don't understand why I get so obsessed. I hate it and it is making my life unmanagable. If there is anyone out there who can give me some suggestions on how to deal with this ugency obsessive behavior I would deeply appreciate any advice. I feel like I am going crazy. I am starting to sleep less and have interuptive sleep. I guess it is the mania kicking in. Thanks to everyone in advance.

Tina~

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 8:57am
((Tina))

I can kind of relate to what you are saying. I too like to try to control things.

Have you read anything on Obsessive Compulsive Disorder?

Are you on any meds? Do you talk with a counselor? Both of these might help.

Take care

Pamela

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 2:32pm
Hi Pamela-

I haven't read too much on OCD but I will. I just got a new therapist and intend on talking to her about my problem with wanting to control things and my feelings that everything needs to be done in a certain time frame. I do take meds for depression(Lexapro and Wellbutrin) they help sometimes. Thanks for your response. I guess my posting about this was hard for people to answer since I didn't get many responses. Thanks again and take care. Sending positive vibes~~~~~~~******~~~~~~~~~

Tina~

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 3:32pm


tINA,

sIT DOWN HANDS ON KNEES TAKE A DEEP BREATH IN THE NOSE AND A DEEP BREATH OUT THE NOSE REPEAT TIL YOUR BREATHING BECOMES RELAXED.

Now onto the thoughts over obsessing about being alone getting married.

No one likes to be alon or wants to be alone so that is normal (not wanting to be alone)

but you cant make him marry you sweetie there seems to be alot going on in his life at this moment let him do his thing and when he has become more secure with what he is doing and the time is right t will all fall into place, pushing to get married now doesnt garuntee that you both will be happy later just take it all in stride.

I have similar thoughts but not the getting married ones like you mine are things like re arranging my funrniture I have to do it the second I get the thought into my head and if I do not do it right then and there at that moment the thought stays in my head until it is done, there are a bunch of other things that get me going like that but I figured I would give just one example.

I also wanted to appoligize for the way the type came up sometimes my computer has a mind of its own.

I wish I could help you out more but if anything comes to me I will try to write to you.

Try some yoga to relax your mind I do it everyday I switch between yoga for flexability and yoga for stamina I switch between the two each day and it has helped alot especially after a crappy day SO GIVE IT A SHOT IT CANT HURT ANY.

gOOD LUCK SWEETIE.

ERIN

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 8:13pm

Hi Tina,


You mentioned trying to deal with some urgent obsessive behavior in your post.

IVHealth Ruth Ann
Community Leader/Ask the Health Librarian