Holiday/Financial related Blues

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2003
Holiday/Financial related Blues
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 10:54pm
Hi All,

Does anyone else feel blue this week because of holiday shopping/financial stress? Just briefly, DH and I have his small, dysfunctional family who we spend holiday dinners with and have an oligation to give gifts to. MIL is 75 and the only one besides DH I really want to buy anything for. She tells me she doesn't need anything - maybe CDs to play in her car. Her DB at almost 77 lives with her. He is a reader (and a gambler), so a book store gift certificate is best. SIL (49) and her dead beat alcoholic BF are very distant. I really do not want to shop for them, but get a generic gift of food,etc. Have not decided yet what to do this year. SIL's DS (18 yo) and GF (17 yo) will be at the dinner. He lives with MIL because of problems with his parents. Will give them a joint gift of movie tickets or ?. He is a high school graduate, unemployed right now and not going to college yet. I do not like how I see his life going and do not want to give him money. I will still be spending around $100 on people I do not have any feelings for. It's an obligation. I go through this every year to keep peace in the family and then feel blue afterwards. I need things for our home and myself and have a limited budget this month (long story -had to pay taxes, and have to put aside money each month for credit card debt).

Anyway, DH and I have had some discussion on this subject. May be my issue is with him,too. He is very carefree with money and would spend too much on gifts if I leave this task to him. Do not want to increase our debt to buy gifts for people I do not care about.

Any suggestions? Tried to suggest a no gift dinner, but MIL controls the event and will not agree to that. Help!

Thanks for listening and hope to hear your thoughts.