Crazy turn of events Triggers

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
Crazy turn of events Triggers
1
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:55pm
A funny thing happened to me this morning. I spoke with the guy that my dad molested when I was a child. He was only one of the guys, but he was the one who came out and told everyone. We had a very good talk. I will be in my hometown this weekend visiting my mom for Christmas, so we are going to get together. He seems like a very nice man. When he came out with his story my dad lost his church (not Catholic) and my mom divorced him. But the Church kept giving him new churches. Apparently there are victims from some of the other churches. There are at least three that we know about from the church that this guy was from.

He's got a lawsuit going on against the church right now. I guess the whole Catholic debacle has caused the laws to change. The statute of limitations on civil cases is my longer now. That's good. For those who don't know my story when I told it months ago, my dad died over 7 years ago. I hadn't spoken to him for 7 years before that.

It was great to talk to this man because he filled in some of the details of my dad's secret life. My father put on such a front of self-righteous piety. But at the same time he was vicious, controlling, and even violent. He assualted me one time when I was little. Hearing this man's story helps me put more of the picture of my father together. I still think he was a psychopath. He was definitely a rageaholic and a predator.

Anyway, it was such a weird thing to talk to this guy that I've heard about for so many years. I want to help him in whatever way I can. His goal is to have the church create a fund to pay for the therapy of any of my dad's victims.

Thanks for listening!

MariaC

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 4:05pm


Maria,

wow I wish I knew the right words to say I want to say that it is great that you spoke with this person but at the sametime it almost doesnt seem like the right thing to say considering the surcumstances.

I think that what this man wants to do with the money is great almost giving back to people I am a sucker for that kind of thing, at least he is doing it to help others that is what is important.

I can not even begin to imagin what it has been like for you..your whole life you had to live with your dad and the way he treated you and then all of this stuff comes out into the open I now it must have been hard but you are doing such good with your life now and that is important..

God I feel like an idiot cause I really cant find the perfect words here I just want to wish you the best when you go and meet this man and I hope that only good comes of the meeting and maybe you tow will be able to help each other.

keeping you in my thoughts.

Erin