Can't say how I feel today...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Can't say how I feel today...
1
Sun, 12-14-2003 - 9:55am
It's just a strange day. I am getting over a major sinus infection that knocked me out cold. The doctor upped my paxil because I was feeling so down. And now my therapy appointment was changed due to snow. bummer. I really needed to go over stuff. It's just been a struggle. I am so tired today. Overwhelmed by my son. Overwhelmed by the idea of getting preggars again. Tho I am pretty sure I want to. It's just after being sick so much this week, I am soooo scared I'll be sick when I am pregnant again. (hospitalized for bad morning sickness 2x with son) Also overwhelmed by work, or my inability to be there due to sickness.

And the holidays just have me all uptight. I wish I could relax and enjoy them. I want to so bad. but I just feel so unconnected to it. And that makes me feel so sad. I just want all the decorations away and it to be overwith. What kind of mom am I? Why can't I just try and enjoy them. I just know I'll feel better once they are done. Isn't that sad? There are just too many expectations with the holidays. I am just sooo tired.

Here's goes my son. He's starting up. He's just constantly wanting my attention and all I want to do is hide.... what is wrong with me....

It's strange, but over the last few months I really feel I have lost ground in getting better. Gone way back. It's weird. Maybe it's the lack of antidepressants. I really thought I was going to get off of them. But I don't think so.

I just want to cry but I can't. Weird eh?

Kelly

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Sun, 12-14-2003 - 5:46pm

You say you are getting over a sinus infection hun,, so it sounds to me like your body just wants to rest. Phyical sickness can really take alot out of us emotionally too.


Last week I actually got sick from stress and trying to do too much ... my body decided it needed sleep hehe and I got so sick until I just had to take the day off and sleep.. I felt alot better the next day..


So right now try to give yourself a little time to feel better and of course having your appt moved was stressfull too and trust me the holidays have my Son wound too so that makes it doubly hard..


Just sending lots of caring thoughts your way..


*hugs