Hi Ladies! maybe a small trig! long!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2003
Hi Ladies! maybe a small trig! long!!!!!
1
Tue, 12-16-2003 - 11:32am
Hugs to all you ladies out there!((((((((((((((Ladies))))))))))) I have read some of the posts and I wanted to respond to them. Without my own computer I am on the libraries terms with computer use. I am at my mom's library now which gives me up to 4 hours a day compared to my library's 1 hour per day. I wish I could stay here for the 4 hours and respond to the posts but I have been at my parent's house for 5 days and I am ready to get home and see my hubby and my animals who haven't seen me since Friday. I am still doing well on the Risperdal even though I am still having weight gain and fluid retention from it but I would rather have to deal with that then planning my death like I was.I was involved yesterday in a minor car accident. I was in a parking garage in my mom's car after dropping gram off at the doctor's and some jerk hit me. It was an under 5 mph hit but still. No damage so I let it go but around 3 hours later I started hurting so I took some Aleve and put a heating pad. Today I seem to be ok but it made me so mad that this jerk wasn't watching. I mean I was stopped behind 2 cars I wasn't going anywhere and he just rammed me. I have been journaling alot more lately which is good for me. I am good at writing. In fact I wanted to give you ladies an update on what I have been doing and maybe some things can help you too. I was worried about Christmas because I can't buy any gifts this year and I know I am getting gifts and that always makes me feel bad that I can't give but I am getting. Yesterday when I came to my mom's library I used microsoft word pad and I wrote a thing for my family about Christmas what it means to me and how I can give them the best gift of all and it doesn't cost a thing and that is my love. I have also been renting movies from my mom's library and watching them. My library is having a lot more dvd's then vhs's so I like mom's. I don't have a dvd player. Anyway I have been getting a lot of "kid" videos and I say that because I am 33 years old and I enjoy some of them. My husband Irv has never seen Herbie the Love Bug movies and so I am checking out three of them today for him to see as they always make me laugh. I rented Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol the other day. I am getting books that I enjoy both fiction and non-fiction. I did some coloring in coloring books that I have this weekend. I am working on a jigsaw puzzle and slowly I am cleaning my house. Even if I am having a bad day and yes even though I am feeling better I still get bad days that I am able to do some small thing to help me cope. I am learning to talk to Irv more about it. If I hear the voice in my head I tell him and we cope together. I used to feel so alone even being married and that was because I felt like talking to him I would think he wouldn't understand or I would be burdening him but that is not the case at all. I have brought him and my family books to read on depression and borderline personality disorder which I also have and the thing I learned ladies is if you give the info they will read it and come to a better understanding. Plus I don't pester them asking if they read it I let them come to me and talk about it or let them bring it up. Relieves me of the burden of pestering them and they are more willing I have found. Well ladies I have written a novel and I appreciate you all sticking with me and I am here for all of you. Love and Hugs Andrea
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
Tue, 12-16-2003 - 12:41pm
Andrea,

It sounds like you have made amazing progress.

I think that things you are doing are so helpful. I also watch shows and movies that cheer me up and make me happy. I try to surround myself with lots of things that I love. I also learned to be gentle with myself. I can do as much as I can do. I give myself small tasks to achieve and congratulate myself on those. That has helped me to slowly become more functional.

I'm sick right now, which is frustrating. I have this bad cold with a very painful sore throat. It hurts a lot each time I swallow. I can't really eat today. But I'm hoping I will lose some weight!

Keep taking care of yourself. You are doing amazing things.

MariaC