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| Mon, 02-02-2004 - 12:17pm |
So anyways, I started a new life with someone else. He's a great guy and has been a great support for me through my rough times. We were friends before we were involved with each other. Shortly after we got together I got pregnant it wasn't that big of a deal seeing as though we had been in each others lives for a long time and knew each other. But then we found out we were having twins....needless to say I'm extremely scared. I'm worried with my emotional status I won't be a good mom. I've thought alot about adoption or giving up all rights to their father and just leaving. I know he would be a great father to them. I can't seem to get over the past it haunts me everyday. I cry myself to sleep I wake up crying and I'm just so unhappy and this should be the happiest time of my life. I've been unable to completely let my boyfriend in my life I just don't trust people. I'm afraid I'll go through the same things I went through before. Alot of the time I pick fights with him or just try to get on his nerves just to push him away. I think he'd be alot happier with someone else. I just don't know what to do. I feel so hopeless....and so scared. and I don't understand how I can be so stupid to allow someone who is so good a chance to leave. thank you to all who took time out to read this. Best wishes to all who are down and out.
Irene

Welcome, (((((((Irene))))))!
Welcome Irene!
First of all sweetie, your hormones are raging right now due the pregnancy so everything is a lot harder to deal with.. Dont think that wont make you a good Mom though... I know you are scared but its ok.
I understand too about having issues of trust after being hurt like you were. I think it would probably really help if you could talk to your doctor about seeing a Therapist for awhile, maybe even you and your BF going together.
*hugs