Community Note - Removed Posts

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2003
Community Note - Removed Posts
3
Mon, 02-09-2004 - 4:05pm

A few of you have emailed regarding removed posts.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
Mon, 02-09-2004 - 6:12pm
I have reviewed the terms of service for Ivillage. I understand how using the name of specific person and calling her a name is construed as "abuse" of another person. While that person has never posted on this board, I completely understand that this violates the tone of Ivillage. I respect that and apologize for doing so on this board.

However, I think it's important that people are sensitive to the pain and struggles of others. The tones of several posts on the board I referred to was abusive. For a CL to tell a person suffering from Fibromyalgia and Chronic Depression that she has no "sympathy" for her is not only insensitive, it is cruel. The CL also compared her own temporary difficulties with dental pain to the poster's struggle with long-term intensive pain that she has sought treatment for from more than one doctor. Several posts recommended that the poster not indulge herself in sleep. However, many people with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome become unemployed and bedridden for the rest of their lives. The tone towards the poster in pain and desperation was more than insensitive, it was emotionally abusive. The greatest reason for this is that she found callousness in a place that advertises itself as being supportive. Not everyone can solve their problems quickly. Most people on these boards have sought solutions for years. It took me over two years to find someone who healed my Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I've spoken to people who have had it for 12 years or more.

I apologize for how long this post is. My point is that the posters and the CL on the board I referred to were also abusive. But they were directly abusive to someone whose vulnerability was glaring and delicate. Their responses sent her into a very understandable tailspin. People with longterm illness already feel shame and guilt. The posts I referred to in my post caused a sensitive person to go back into her suicidal depression. If that isn't abuse, then I don't know what is.

MariaC

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2003
Mon, 02-09-2004 - 6:37pm

Thanks for your input!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
Mon, 02-09-2004 - 10:37pm
Thank you, Cindi. I again apologize for my post. I appreciate you taking my input into consideration. There are many very vulnerable people who post on these boards. The person who was the target of the posts I am referring to sunk to the verge of suicide as a result of these posts. Depression and chronic physical illness leave people like her in a delicate position. Consequently, even frustrated board members need to avoid anything resembling a direct attack in their responses. The members had the option to simply say nothing. There words could not have helped this individual in any way.

Thank you again for your feedback.

Best Regards,

MariaC