THANK YOU to all who answered

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
THANK YOU to all who answered
1
Sun, 02-22-2004 - 8:02pm
I want to thank everyone who answered my recent post. I had such a very painful week. It was all the internal stuff I talked about. I really appreciate the heartfelt answers. Trac and Erin, your responses gave me so much strength. It helped to hear your personal stories with similar struggles. It's rotten, isn't it?!?!?! There was a common theme in your responses about how this new woman's culture probably sets her up to take a lot more negativity and abuse from a man than I ever would. It helps a lot to hear from others that if he treated me so badly, he's probably doing the same to her. It's been killing me to think that he is giving this new girl all the things that he never gave me. I loved the response that I should be thankful that I'm not in her position, saddled with a child and an unhappy, controlling, judgmental man who makes me feel rotten and not good enough. Sometimes I need to hear that stuff all over again. So if I sink down again, please understand. All of your help made a huge difference!!!! THANK YOU!!!! THANK YOU!!!! THANK YOU!!!!

You all have amazing compassion, openness and insight.

Love,

MariaC

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 02-22-2004 - 8:13pm
MariaC, I'm sorry I missed your post the first time. I went back and read it, and I am sorry you are going through so much. I agree with what the others said, that you are lucky to be rid of this horrible man...and that his cheating is not a reflection on you, but only on him. I wish I knew more of what to say to help you through this time, but I do want you to know that I'm thinking of you as well, and sending feel-better vibes...

I have had one similar experience...after my one semi-serious boyfriend and I broke up, I kept seeing him around campus (I was still in college) talking to other girls in obviously flirtatious ways...I would pass him (from a distance) at one time, and then pass him again coincidentally an hour later, and he would still be in animated conversation with a beautiful girl. It really hurt, even though he didn't cheat on me while we were going out (which would have been so much worse)...I kept thinking that I wasn't good enough, that I could so easily be tossed away and forgotten.

It is a very hard thing to go through, and I can't claim to have gone through the kind of hurt that you have with this man. I really sympathize with you and want to tell you that I (and the other ladies on this board, I'm sure) will be there for you if you want to vent, cry, talk, etc.

Hugs,

Rose