I just want to say.............THANK YOU
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I just want to say.............THANK YOU
| Fri, 02-27-2004 - 1:47pm |
I want to thank Sarah,cathy,voguegirl,mariaC,barb,stacy,pamela and ilvdana24..............
You ladies all of you ladies here are so wonderful caring loving supportive bright beautiful human being who deserve all the happiness in the world..
I want to thank you all for your advice and suggestions and support and I will be looking into many many different avenues to help me deal with this anger issue that way I can live my life and be happy for once.
Once again thank you to all those who replied those who lurked those who read and those who are or have gone thru the samething as me.
I love you all.
Erin

I love you, too, Sweetie!
I'm glad that you are considering everyone's responses so seriously. I used to be emotionally crippled by pain. I still have bouts of it, like those two recent weeks when I had a serious depression because of my ex. But most of my life is very happy and peaceful now. That is such a huge thing for me, Erin. It's been a gradual change.
My dh bought me a punching bag about 6 years ago. It's one of those ones where you fill the base with water, but you can empty it and move it easily. You don't have to hang it, or anything. It costs about $100 at a sporting goods store.
It took me awhile to start to use the bag. I had such a hard time letting my anger out. I felt guilty and ashamed to have anger. So I started watching Xena. When Xena would be beating up the villians, I'd punch on my punching bag, imagining it was my sister and focusing all of my anger at her into each punch. I had so much anger at her for the years of emotional abuse, screaming, and degrading insults she had heaped on me. I've heard for years that depression is anger turned inward. I think that in part it is. When I'm mad at someone and don't find a neutral way to let it out, like yelling in my car or beating my punching bag, then I get really depressed. All that rage comes out at myself in my mind, telling myself I'm worthless and all of that stuff.
Often, like last week, I don't even realize that what I have is anger. I just feel so depressed and worthless. But letting it out helps a lot.
I have another good way to let it out. I take a bath and yell under the water. The water softens the sound and I can scream at loud as I want to.
There was one time in my life when would "process" my anger twice a week at regular times. When the house was empty I'd take a broomstick and beat my bed with it, screaming and all of that. I would go with whatever feeling came up and focus on that. I'd move through rage at my dad, my mom, God, whoever. I'd do it until I was too tired to do it anymore, maybe an hour or hour and a half. I always felt so cleansed and awesome afterwards. It made me feel peaceful and good during the rest of my life. It was amazing.
I think that reevaluating your beliefs and thoughts is just as important as letting the pain out, but right now I think the pain and anger are debilitating for you.
I'm always here for you, Girl. Please feel free to email me directly if you need anything. Taking on your pain takes courage, the courage to do something in a different way than you ever have. But it's not more painful than what you already live with. In fact, I think it's easier than living in the kind of pain you do every day.
All My Love,
MariaC
We love ya!!!
Glad to help you out sweetie.
Pamela