How do you cope?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2003
How do you cope?
4
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 3:10am
How do you cope with daily life? I am swamped with things right now; wrapping up affairs after my husband's death and my own work. I've pretty much done everything I can at this time about the first, the last and also the most imporatant part I have had to entrust to a representative which is killing me because I feel out of control. I want to start a new life so much, and leave all of this behind, but I can't do anything until this is taken care of.

I started working in January, two weeks after my DH died, and I'm starting at the bottom because I didn't send out anything in the two years I was taking care of him. So now I'm working at home, writing, which I love, but I'm so sick with the medication that I'm unable to stick to my normal schedule. Normally I am a very dedicated and disciplined person; I stick to my working times and I complete what I have to in time. But now... ugh!

I have the feeling that the more I give in to the feelings of depression, the more out of control my life gets. How do you all cope? Force yourself to stick to a routine? Or do you let yourself go until the meds kick in?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 8:21am

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Ijules1000)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


I have found that forcing myself to handle the routine things works better for me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 9:48am


I am sorry for your lose..........

for me I need a structured schedual I need time limits I need to have things done at a certain time get up at a certain time take my meds at a certain time ect.....

I am a little OCD so it is easy for me to follow a schedual since it is very hard for me to do things that are not planned out.

I also work out almost everyday for about an hour it used to be 2 hours a day but I made myself cut back because I was too thin and sickly looking now I am learning to jjust work out one hour a day, but for me working out helps me relax relieves stress and makes me feel better it helps erase the bad feelings and shows me that I am taking care of myself.

but anyways there are lots of things that help me the smell of rose candles or jasmine insense petting my dog watching a good movie reading writting ect...

But you also need to let yourself grieve over your lose I can only imagine how hard it all is for you and I wish you nothing but the best and I do hope for you that in time you will be able to live your life again.

Erin

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 11:18am
Thank you both for sharing this with me. I am also OCD - and it's helped me cope so far. I used to be so disciplined about everything and that made me feel good about myself. It helped me attain all my goals, even when my husband was sick. It helped me maintain my physical health and my relationships, instead of becoming thin and weak and lonely. Time to stop this insanity!

I know I need to take time for myself and to grieve, but I also need to work. I have just made a schedule; planning everything from early morning yoga sessions to work, from the necessary administration sessions to the exact moment I have to stop working to cook a meal, or take time to be with my friends, reconnect, or pamper myself. I've downloaded a timetracking tool for the pc, that you can configure to set off an alarm when you've been working on a certain project for a certain amount of time. That's definitely going to make a difference!

Anyway; I've done everything I had to do so far today, including yoga, walking my dogs, and doing the laundry. Tomorrow I am going to revise a script I have to send out to LA before the deadline next Thursday - and this just getting this done will make me so proud of myself!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2004
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 3:11pm

Honey, that basically sounds like a good plan.

AcornLeaves