Triggers been gone a long while
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Triggers been gone a long while
| Sat, 03-27-2004 - 11:01pm |
Well I have been gone a long while from posting. I had my husband arrested for choking my son and slapping my daughter. The abuse had been going on for a while. My mother in law is not angry with me but still. I have an appointment with legal aid attny. to file for divorce and am living with a boyfriend. I just found out he told his room mate that he did not think he wanted to be with me anymore and that really hurts. We had talked about getting married and I left for a few days and went to a friends house because I was depressed and needed some space from all the gripping. My children had to go to Oklahoma with an aunt until I can get back on my feet and that caused tension with another aunt. I was told I did not care for my children other wise I would not have sent them away when there world was crumbling. I lost my apartment so cps told me to find a relative that could take them until the end of may when I should be in another apartment and that way I could take care of my children with out being homeless. Needless to say I am real down right now because people are making it out like I don't love my kids and I am a bad mom. Friends and relatives alike. My husband made me feel worthless and like a bad mother and now people are saying the same thing. Not to mention that because I feel like I am not worth anything I have become grippy and just well I am treating the people I love bad. I guess it is to prove what I believe. I don't feel like I am lovable and can be treated good or worth the effort. I really care for my boyfriend but I may have chased him away. I have always been in abusive relationships and for once I found someone who will not abuse me or my children and I am running away from him and driving him away. I just feel, well, depressed and worthless right now. I really need some true friends right now. Maybe I am not worth the effort.

This place is filled with wonderful and diverse women, we will hold you up when you need us to. You will hold some of us up too.
I think you are inspirational, all the adversity you have faced. You are coming through this, and you will find your way back to happiness. In the mean time, take it one step and one day at a time.
Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.
Take care,
Lisa-)
Welcome back, ((((((Metyson))))))!