Back again - triggers
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Back again - triggers
| Mon, 05-31-2004 - 8:54am |
Hi. I posted here several weeks ago and about my relationship with my fiance who suffers from depression. We have had a few issues come up that we need to deal with in our relationship - lack of communication, job related stress and the fading spark between us. I have become increasingly stressed about work and began relying on him. He's been wonderful but lately he's said he has nothing left to give. We both reached a point where we were just drained. We've talked about a few things and I feel like I have my emothional 'strength' back. Communication is difficult though. I'm not the most talkative person and he's often too down or just in a bad mood after a long day and doesn't want to talk. He did start improving last week but it's hard to tell what it will be like when I come home from work. I want to get a part time job in addition to helping him part time at his business. I think it would help him and improve our relationship at the same point. It just feels like we're floundering right now and it's a little scary. I'm going to see if I can track down the Depression Fallout book. Thanks for reading.

I recently recommended a book on male depression to someone on this board, but I don't know if it was you or not. It's called "I Don't Want to Talk About It: The Secret Legacy of Male Depression" by Terrence Real. It's an amazing book! I highly recommend it for both you and your fiance.
It's hard for men to reach for help with depression. They usually think they have to handle it on their own. But it has a very high cure rate with antidepressants and Cognitive Behavior Therapy, used together. Exercise also has incredible results on depression.
Remember that the partner of a depressed person often gets pulled down into the quagmire of depression after enough time with the other person. Be careful and take good care of yourself. Getting a part-time job that you enjoy could help you have outside experiences that keep your mood up.
Good Luck,
MariaC