Indifferent husband
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| Thu, 06-10-2004 - 4:04am |
But I do have a question and I hope someone will have an answer...
I have been on Celexa since April 13th. while it was difficult at first, I have settled with it, and I have seen some improvements. I still am trying to consider going to therapy although I know it may end my military career :(
It took me a month to tell my husband I had started this medicine. The hardest thing is I don't think he took it well. While he displayed support, he avoides discussion about it, when I really need to talk to him about what's going on. So I can't.... he doesn't know the half of it all because I am afraid he will think badly of me, and with the way he has reacted with what I've told him so far. Our relationship has deteriorated slowly over the past month since I told him. He avoides me, he doesn't want to talk to me, he is unaffecionate, not to mention there is NO INTIMACY. He seems distant from me, as if he has lost interest in me.
Last night, we got in an "argument" over a minor situation. We haven't fought pretty much since I started Celexa, and last night really seemed one sided. I was almost amused by his frustration, and I think my calmness frustrated him more. Finallyhe just yelled at me "I hate my life!" with such anger, I literally got nervous and scared. Is this leading to the ultimate demise of our relationship? We have been together for 11 years this year, and we have always fussed at each other over the years -- until now. I wonder if he needs arguments to release tension? I don't want to go back to that, I was mad at him daily for a whole array of issues, and I was just tired of being irratable, sad about our relationship, paranoid he was cheating on me, etc. Celexa has helped all that. i also don't want to lie to him and say I am off the medication, and I also don't want to fight anymore.
I still love him, I try to tell him that daily, but I just don't see it in return. Maybe it has been this way for years and I didn't know because I was busy with myself.
We don't even sleep together anymore, for all sorts of excuses, he snores,the room is too hot, the baby is crying, etc.
Imiss the love we used to have, but it just not there anymore. Somehow I woke up and realised my husband just doesn't adore me anymore
What can I do????
~Sad in Germany~
Christy

Hi Christy,
I know how difficult this is (maybe you'll understand howmuch so when i tell you my first reaction was ONLY a month). Only i'm the one who tends to be indifferent and avoiding - having that feeling that i'm being watched
prodi_gal
I'm on Lexapro, which is pretty much the same as Celexa. Too bad about your husband, but maybe you can get him a book or an article that explains better what you are dealing with and he can read it on his own time.
It's not easy to deal with all these issues. Try to sit him down and just let him know how you feel without attacking him. I don't know about your DH, but mine gets defensive real easy.
Hang in there and stay in touch please.......
Hugs Ilka
I would agree with the above. Now that you have changed, you have also changed the dynamics of your relationship. Eventually, I think, this will be beneficial for you both, but it can be hard for your partner to get used to. I agree that he may need time to get used to this "new you," and it will force him to look at his pattern of interaction with you. Have you thought of couples counselling? It may be a good idea for you two if things don't improve in the next couple of months.
I'm glad to hear you're feeling better overall.
Take care,
Nicola
Christy, I'm glad to hear you are feeling so much better on the Celexa.