WHAT NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!! TRIGGERS!!!!!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2003
WHAT NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!! TRIGGERS!!!!!!!!!!
4
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 4:58pm
As most of you know I have thought about ending my life and I have made a couple of attempts to do so. I only got through this last weekend by having my parent's and husband watch me and even then I still tried to end my life. On Monday I talked to Kara my T and she recommended that I go to the ER.On Sat though I talked to Kara and she told me she spoke to Weiss my pysch doc and he doesn't think I need to be in the hospital. Well, it got so bad with the thoughts and wanting to end my life that I packed a bag full of clothes and took myself to the ER. I told the ER doc about wanting to end my life and the attempts I made and after talking about a half hour he said he would go call Weiss and was I willing to do what Weiss would recommend and I said yes of course. About a half hour later he comes back and says Weiss says I can go home. So home I went. Not very happy about it though.Called the office and made an appointment for Weiss on Friday after I see Kara because I want to know why he didn't admit me. Do I have to cut my arm first before anything will be done for me? I want this pain and unhappiness to end. In the mean time I got my parent's and husband watching me 24/7 to make sure I don't attempt to take my life again which I would rather be dead then to go on feeling this way. i just needed to vent because I am angry that I didn't get anywhere and that no one is really helping me. Love and Hugs Andrea
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 12:11am
(((((((((((((((((Andrea)))))))))))))))))

Hoping you find the strength and help you are crying for.

Know I am sending good thoughts your way.

Love Alanna

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 11:51am
I can't imagine why your pdoc didn't want you admitted. He sounds like he's kind of arrogant about thinking he knows what is going on in your mind. In the therapist training program that I'm in, we are pushed to admit someone if they seem like they will be an imminent threat to themselves. Perhaps Weiss is under the mistaken notion that you won't actually kill yourself since you haven't done it already.

I know that feeling of being in so much pain that you can't face another day of it. The pain is unbearable!!!! I've been there, Sweetie. I've been there way too many times. It can get better. I got better for me with the right therapist and some changes to my life and how I'm living it. It's been a slow road. The pain I've carried my whole life still comes up at times. I feel like I still have a long way to go in dealing with people. But I'm not in constant pain anymore. I was in constant pain for most of seven years and then still had frequent pain in the past year, mostly related to specific situations. But it has gotten better and better. So it can end.

I'm sending prayers and hugs your way. Hopefully tomorrow Weiss will give you some insight into what you can do next.

All My Best,

MariaC

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 8:33pm
Andrea!

I don't know how you're feeling, as my suicide thoughts have never gone that far. But know that I'm thinking about you, and praying that you pull through. Maybe it helps to take things a step at a time. "I will get through to lunch.... I will get through to dinner... I will get through to breakfast" (or not, i'm not a therapist, I just know that taking bigger problems and making them into a series of smaller ones, and dealing with them one at a time, helps me get through things).

I really believe what the other poster said about things can and will get better.

here's a hug ((((HUG)))). I hope you are safe tonight.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Mon, 07-26-2004 - 12:00pm
First off I think that it is odd that the ER turned you away after talking to your pdoc

it just doesnt sound right to me at all when I went to the ER they ran some tests took my blood monitored my brain waves and admitted me they never called my pdoc they had me speak with their shrink the next day cause they wanted to monitor me over night they had the number to my therapist and my pdoc and when I begged to go hom after 2 days they called my therapist to make sure that I would keep my priomise to go and see her when I got home which I did and she called them to let them know that I went in to see her..

SO for the hospital to turn you away doeesnt sound right to me at all

and it doesnt sound right that your Pdoc is telling you that you do not need to go into the hospital it just doesnt make sense to me and it doesnt seem to add up at all..

maybe you should go to a different hospital one that will admit you cause if you are suicidal they should not turn you away...