Paxil - Help....

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-07-2004
Paxil - Help....
Tue, 09-07-2004 - 7:20pm
I'm going to dive right into my problem. Being that only a handful of people know i'm on Paxil (mother, sister, dad). I'm 22 years old, I recently (about 3 weeks ago) got put on Paxil (started at 25mg). I went through all of the crappy side effects and i've dealt with that. I was on Paxil about 2 years ago for Panick Attacks/Social Anxiety Disorder, so the side effects are not new to me. Here's the problem, since I started taking Paxil, i've started to Drink. A LOT. I drink everyday, at least 6 or 7 beers. I've started smoking again (something I quiet almost 2 years ago, and have never had an urge to try again). Right now when i'm drinking and smoking I have never been happier. I know it sounds sick...but it's true. I currently have a great job working at the corporate office of a very successful company. I make more money than I would have ever dreamed of being only 22, and i'm also finishing up my degree at the same time. For the past three weeks, I have gone completely out of control. I'm way to proud to talk to my family about my drinking. My dad is an alcoholic and i've had problems with drinking before, and I don't want to scare them. It's become so bad that I literally spent all last weekend drinking and smoking....and nothing else. Well...actually, I started to throw up after I eat. yep....bulemia. I'm not overweight, i'm actually (or was) a pretty active person. This is destroying my life. I cannot concentrate at work....I actually have called in twice in the past 3 weeks because I slept through my alarm clock. No one knows whats going on except me because all of my drinking is being done privately. As of right this second, i'm writing this, drinking a beer...my third in the past hour, and i'm chain smoking. I have no idea what is wrong with me. This might sound a little like i'm jumping around topics but I don't know how to express myself correctly. I'm just looking for some advice. My life is spinning out of control. I feel like I should go see someone...a psychiatrist....or someone, but I don't even have a trusted family doctor to go see to talk too. What do you think? What should I do? It's not as easy as telling me to stop drinking...or stop smoking. Cause I can't. I'm feeling extremely weak willed...and out of control. I love this feeling but then again, I hate it. I know i'm wrecking myself. The last thing I want to do is lose my job and fail out of school because of this. Do you think my drinking has to do with the paxil? I've read that mixing paxil with alcohol sometimes gives you such a "high" that you can't stop. But how do I get past this? I just am looking for some advice.....something comforting, something to kick my ass into gear. I'm not suicidal or anything like that, i'm just feeling out of control. Please help if you get the chance. Thanks.