Update on the Jerk

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Update on the Jerk
3
Tue, 09-21-2004 - 10:28pm
also known as my husband.

Hi guys. After teaching all day, I went to a 2 hour workshop and then to choir practice. I got home at 9:10 and it was a repeat of last night.My husband is sitting in front of the tv and the kitchen is a mess. So I cleaned the kitchen, picked up newspapers and came upstairs to try to figure out why I keep trying. My life is terrible and I feel awful and I'm tired of taking all these meds and tired of going to see my doctor (even tho he is REALLY cute) and I'm really tired of going to therapy all the time.

Lisa---you asked about couples therapy. Well... we did try it about 5 years ago and it was a disastor. My husband would not listen to anything the therapist said and after 5 visits the therapist said we should give up and get a divorce.

Is it almost Friday??????

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2004
Wed, 09-22-2004 - 5:43am
Funny that's what I call my ex husband. I know I am new and don't know you or your situation but why don't you throw an old fashioned hissy fit? or just leave the mess for that matter. I looked at your profile and your kids are grown. Maybe if he runs out of dishes he'll get the point. I've read a lot of your posts and it sounds like your fairly overextended and maybe you need to worry more about you. Trust me the world won't end if you leave the kitchen a mess and take a hot bath instead. I'm not trying to sound flip

Maureen/Mo

If this was a real life it would have come with instructions.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Wed, 09-22-2004 - 5:51am
I am so sorry Debbie, and I think I have to agree with Mo I think it was that said, take a hot bath and leave the dishes. I know mine isn't perfect with household chores, but isn't as blind as yours sounds like.

This is my one and only marriage and is a good marriage, but if I was in one that wasn't fulfilling, not sure I would choose to stay in it, but I know that is a big step to take and might be more than you could take on right now.

You might have a jerk in your house, but you have MANY here on this board that love you and appreciate you immensely, take care, hugs, Josie.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 09-22-2004 - 6:32am
Mo and Josie, Thanks for replying. You both had a great idea--except for one thing. I am a perfectionist and cannot stand it when things are out of place. Plus---it only takes a few minutes to load and unload a dishwasher (so the jerky idiot should do it!!!). I just really cannot take it when things are messy. I think I told the story about the magazines in my doctor's office last Friday.That's just a small example. Even my students know that I like things to be just right. I did take the hot bath tho---it was nice---altho it didn't help me sleep (which is what I was hoping for). Oh well, I'm off now for another long day and I'm already exhausted. Have a good day guys! Debbie