SICK AND TIRED(triggers)
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| Sun, 10-03-2004 - 11:52pm |
I have been trying to keep away from stuffs that could hurt me. ANd thanks you for all the e-mails....thanks. I have received them ...and i have been feeling too upset to come online...now I am even more angry and upset.
I want to hurt myself ...on the wrist or something...coz i have a appointment with a psychiatrist today, 4th october. AND my friend said he cannot bring me there.
AND i am sick and tired of people letting me down...especially since july that i cannot eat and sleep.And i have been telling this guy. His name :soe min than.
(from myanmar)
He lied to me, and continues to do it. I am sad. Just that I wanna hurt myself in front of him to let everyone knows that i am really sick and i need to seek help!
I have missed three appointments already.
Thank you everyone for listening!

For me, the past 2 years in therapy and 1.5 years on a med, I am learning who are safe people and who aren't, and not to "put all my eggs into one basket", so I would say that "friend" you described leaves something to be desired. I had to push away a girlfriend of over 12 years after she repeatedly hurt my feelings, we would make amends, BAM she would do it again, I finally realized learning to nurture myself meant no more Karen in my life.
Again, I hope you make it to that appointment today, and very glad to hear you are still here, hugs, Josie.
Hi hun!
Sounds like you need to find someone besides that "friend" to rely on.
*hugs
Shortly after i put up the message on monday, 4th october, i cried ...asking my mother to bring me to the appointment.
Then I called my counsellor(have been seeing her for a few years, but everytime i called her, she was too busy to talk to me, have been like this for quite a while, for about one year, and she wants to end our client-counsellor relationship, she mentioned it two years ago.) ,asking her to bring me to the doctor...coz i really feel like ending my life. My counsellor called my father to bring me to the doctor but he came home to read newspaper.
I was very upset...calling my counsellor saying, i want to help myself...i nearly hurt myself...but she said i have already asked your father home...he should be the one to bring you to the doctor.
I was very upset, i nearly hurt myself, and my effort to prevent myself from getting hurt is not working, like i called my counsellor, my last resort, to ask her to bring me to the doctor.
I am really upset over here. If the shows shown is true, to change my identity and live somewhere else, i wish to live in places where people do care about me.
I am upset...to the point where even now i type,i cannot type well, and i cannot watch t.v. programmes anymore, i used to watch lots of t.v. programmes...now i cannot do anything, my life is worse than death. I don't know what to do.
I cannot do anything anymore, i asked my counsellor to read the postings i put up, she cannot find this site.
Now i am left with no one to care about me anymore.
help!
We are here for you, you are not alone.
Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.
Take care,
Lisa-)
Co-CL Depression Support
But what I do know is that sometimes our parents let us down badly.
I finally had to give up and learn that my father will never love me
the way I always wanted him to. No matter how brave, or smart, or
strong I am, he will still let me down by being critical and hurtful.
So now I try to remember that allowing him to hurt my feelings is my
choice. Of course, since I have moved out that makes it easier to
get up and leave if things get too bad.
Have you tried a local church? I know several seniors at my church
drive folks without cars to appointments. Or does your city have a
local bus line? I know taxis are terribly expensive.
Try your best to remember you deserve respect. Please don't hurt
yourself for anyone's attention. It's not worth it.