JUST DON'T KNOW...................Trig

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2003
JUST DON'T KNOW...................Trig
2
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 6:31pm
I am back in therapy, after my anti-anxiety medication stopped working. HAVE TO LEARN LIFE SKILLS AT HANDLING MY ANXIETY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now all I am is Down about life, everything. You name it I Hate Hate Hate everything.

It's hard for me to get out of bed in the morning. I do only because I Have TOO. I could go on & on about everything but that would just bore all of you.

Am very depressed about everything in general. All I want to do is curl up in a corner & stay there. OH, I can put on a good face when I have to. I was just changed from lexapro to Prozac. Why doesn't anything seem to help????????????

I thought of suicide alot, but I wouldn't want to leave my family with a mess. Am getting to lean harder and harder to make averything go away.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Mon, 10-11-2004 - 3:56am
Hi, and I love your name, Tinybuns, if that refers to your backside, I sure couldn't have that nickname for myself.

Okay, I know until the day God calls me to heaven, I will be practicing life skills to handle my anxiety and my depression also. Yes, some days it is more of an effort than others, but I can see where it will always be there and this is just something I have accepted. After I first went on a med, and my therapist called me as she was out of state with an ill daughter and was checking up on me, I was so anxious on the phone, and she said something that has stuck with me since then, "the meds only do so much and you have to do your part", anyhow, for me, never was a truer statement said.

I don't always sleep well, so never even set alarm clocks, and I love to get up in the morning as I love to drink my coffee as I do my daily reading of 12 step and Christian meditation books, love coming online and checking this and another board and seeing if I got any new emails. Then I love to exercise, so I enjoy doing that afterwards. My point is, maybe find something in the morning that you enjoy doing so getting up would have a positive feature of it.

I get tense going to therapy as I know I can't hide from her, yet it is so beneficial that for most of this year I have paid out of pocket when my insurance company quit paying, I shared with dh (as sometimes he is wondering, WHY am I still going) how last friday when I had some rough times and tears, some of the recent things my therapist and I have been working on, it really helped me get through that afternoon intact. So then he smiled and said good.

Don't know what else to say to you, just I hope today is a better day for you, take care, hugs, Josie.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2004
Mon, 10-11-2004 - 6:53am

(((Tinybuns)))) I understand all those things you wrote about.