Hate Life

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Hate Life
3
Sun, 11-07-2004 - 2:49pm
I've been so depress for so long particularly this year. I'm in a finanical jam as well as a job jam. I did not have any success with my job interviews so far and it's a very slow process. My husband is not very supportive in a loving way. He is not also very understanding. He just got back on the right track in his professional life after a set-back. In addition, I also have health problems where I learned this year that I have a lump in my breast. I have gotten an ultrasound almost 6 month ago which is a begin noddule which needs surgery. I have not taken care of it since then as to not seen another breast specialist for a second opinion. I am so disgusted with life and how it is so harsh and bitter on me while others it is so very kind and gracious to them. I am at a point where I was almost run down by a car when crossing a street going home that I am absolutely so disgusted with life. I just want out so very bad. I am in therapy but have not attended on a weekly basis due to my tight budget. My husband and I have separate bank account for independent freedom, however we do have a joint CD and a joint checking account from our wedding monetary gifts. We decided that if either of us is unemployed we are both responsible for our share of the household bills. My husband is not going to help or cut me slack with my share of the bills. Thus, I have no choice but to beg my parents for finanical help which is embarassing. I am absolutely so sick and disgusted with life. I go to work, do my job, and go home without putting on a smile or a friendly "good morning" or "hello" to the people in the office (it's a small office total 8 people including myself). Note: small companies does NOT mean friendly corporate culture environment like a family setting. I am not happy as it shows. I come home and just be so bitter and explode with inner anger to anyone who is near me. I just become a totally different person than I was in my youth as a result of the "real world" is a harsh place.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
In reply to: chmpgnrose
Sun, 11-07-2004 - 10:59pm

Hi and welcome


Sorry you arent getting alot of support from your DH because I know how hard it is to face challenges alone.

*hugs             

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
In reply to: chmpgnrose
Sat, 11-20-2004 - 10:35am
I got laid off today from my job-Friday, November 19th, just FYI. Happy that I'm out of being a receptionist as I was miserable since they gave me this option which I was very stupid to accept it. However, somewhat depressed because I have no income.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2004
In reply to: chmpgnrose
Sat, 11-20-2004 - 10:28pm

I am so sorry for all you are going through right now. I think at a time like this a man and and a woman should be able to lean on and support one another, I understand how cruel life can be and how unfair it can be and that is why your DH to you, and you to your DH, should be a shelter and a safe haven to one another. I would have a real heart to heart talk with him and tell him how much I need him right now.

You need rest and someone to be strong for you.

Lynette