Feeling REALLY Down!
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Feeling REALLY Down!
| Tue, 11-09-2004 - 1:42pm |
Well, anyone who has read my previous posts knows my situation with my family. To make a long story short, I am having a babyshower next Monday and I invited my aunt. (Not the one my mother has a problem with) She doesn't want to come because I didn't invite my mother! She wants me to start talking to my mom again because she thinks I am in the wrong. And from what I heard, my mom wants me to come to her and apologize before she will even start talking to me again! And I don't think I have done anything wrong! Now, I can really say that I have no one besides my husbands side of the family and my other aunt that my mom doesn't like. I don't think I can handle this anymore! I am about to explode! It's like everything I do is so wrong. My family only judges people with what they see. They don't look deeper than that. How can I show people that I am 18 and I am in charge of my own life? Why can't they understand that???!!! I've had it with all of them! I don't know how to deal with what's being put on me. Quiet often, I find myself asking God why he is putting me through this living hell. I'm not strong enough! (Atleast I don't think I am anyways) I am so depressed and I don't know how to tell anyone without them looking at me like I am some looser. I even tried talking to my husband but I don't even think he knows what to think about how I am feeling. I've tried to explain to him how I feel by asking him what he would do if he lost everything that he once had. He said that he would just deal with it and block it out. Oh, if he only knew! It's not that easy! I am dead to my mother and the rest of my family! How are you supposed to deal with that? Will this ever end? Why can't they just leave me alone?! I am sorry for ramblin' but I am about to go crazy... I am barely hanging on here and I need someone's help...

Many folks believe that you are only given burdens you can handle. I am not sure if that is true but we are here to help you in your burdens.
Keep posting and ranting. Many folks can relate to families not understanding. You are right that many people look only at the surface of things. It is so frustrating.
I can only hope that at some point the purpose of all this frustration will come to light.
In the meantime, we are here for you!
Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.
Take care,
Lisa
Co-CL Depression Support