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| Thu, 11-11-2004 - 7:30pm |
I do not know how much longer I want to "hold on." I do so because I love my son so much and I would never want to hurt him.
I feel so unsupported and alone.All my friends live pretty far away and they work and have their own families.I work part-time(usually nights and weekends). I do not even think my husband knows how depressed I am.
I used to be a good housekeeper. Now it is hard to do anything and my house is a mess. When my kids were little I was a good homemaker.Now I am so fatigued that I hardly do any housework,I figure what's the use; no one comes to see us anyway.
When my kids were young,I not only took care of them and my home, but I participated in all of their activities.I taught Sunday School and my husband and I even started a Cub Scout troop and were Den Leaders
Due to circumstances: my sons' grwowing up, my health problems,my son's health problems , my Dad's illness and death and my work schedule. I had to stop being involved in these activities.
None of the people I knew when I was involved in these activities want anything to do with me now. It is like they have a "clique" and I am not included. I have tried to contact them .One of then was a very good friend and although I have tried to contact her several times she wants nothing to do with me. I feel that nearly everyone has abandoned me.It makes me wonder what is wrong with me. It makes feel guilty and like a failure.
Almost all I do(Besides work) is eat, cry ,watch TV and do word puzzles. At work I put on my "smiley face " and pretend nothing is wrong.
I see my doctor and my counselor on Monday and my psychiatrist on Thursday. I wonder if anything can or will help get out of this despair I feel.Thank you for listening
I feel so unsupported and alone.All my friends live pretty far away and they work and have their own families.I work part-time(usually nights and weekends). I do not even think my husband knows how depressed I am.
I used to be a good housekeeper. Now it is hard to do anything and my house is a mess. When my kids were little I was a good homemaker.Now I am so fatigued that I hardly do any housework,I figure what's the use; no one comes to see us anyway.
When my kids were young,I not only took care of them and my home, but I participated in all of their activities.I taught Sunday School and my husband and I even started a Cub Scout troop and were Den Leaders
Due to circumstances: my sons' grwowing up, my health problems,my son's health problems , my Dad's illness and death and my work schedule. I had to stop being involved in these activities.
None of the people I knew when I was involved in these activities want anything to do with me now. It is like they have a "clique" and I am not included. I have tried to contact them .One of then was a very good friend and although I have tried to contact her several times she wants nothing to do with me. I feel that nearly everyone has abandoned me.It makes me wonder what is wrong with me. It makes feel guilty and like a failure.
Almost all I do(Besides work) is eat, cry ,watch TV and do word puzzles. At work I put on my "smiley face " and pretend nothing is wrong.
I see my doctor and my counselor on Monday and my psychiatrist on Thursday. I wonder if anything can or will help get out of this despair I feel.Thank you for listening
Signatures On
| Thu, 11-11-2004 - 8:57pm |
Oh you are such a sweetheart. I hope u dont take that in a bad way, but when I read your post I just wanted to cry b/c I think u are such a kind, sweet person with such a good heart & deserve more happiness. I think the first step here is to talk with your husband. Communication is important. Maybe he feels down too & u dont know it yet, so u can support one another. Im not sure what to suggest, but it does seem like some kind of change is needed for sure. Even little changes could brighten your day. The clique thing bugs me b/c Ive been in the situation too. Those ppl probably are busy & just stick to the "convenient" friendships b/c they see each other anyway. I have the feeling that if they parted ways then they wouldnt bother keeping in contact either. I dont think its nice to be that way, but its probably the case in my view. I often feel like I have no friends too, and it can get lonely. Its hard to find true friends. We are your friends here :) If u ever want to email me just to talk u can through my profile. I hope things will start to look up for u a.s.a.p. HUGS
