sad and adrift

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2004
sad and adrift
2
Mon, 11-15-2004 - 11:44am
I am new to his board, and am just looking for some support and someone to listen to me...

I have been feeling so down lately.

I feel unwanted.

I fell ugly inside and out.

I feel stupid.

I feel unwanted emtionally.

Unwanted physically.

Unwanted mentaly.

Unwanted sexually.

Unwanted and unworty.

Unworthy of anything in this world.I feel I have not been doing anything right lately.

I am in despair. When I look at myself, I see a failure.

Someone who cannot make it in this world.

Someone who cannt do anything right at all.

Even with m boyfriend I cannot do anything right.

Every time I say something, he gets upset.

I was only trying to make a joke this morning, and he cut me down...It hurt so much.

I'm going back to the mental and emotional despair I was in last summer.

I am trying with every fiber in my being to do things right.

I look at my boyfriend and really feel like a failure.

I want to tell him to to come back in few years.

When I have my life togother.

I cannot pay my bills.

I work all the time and I can never seem to get ahead.

I feel I am only going backward, with every hour I am here.

My family is halfway around the world.

I want a hug from my mama so much!

It has been almost two years since I last had a hug from her.

I don't know how to stop feeling this way.

It is hard for me to smile.

I want to leave. I want to leave this life.

I hate feeling this way.

I hate being filled with so much dispair...

I just want to bang my head against the wall.

Physical pain I can deal with.

Mental and emotional I cannot handle so well.

I am so lonely.

Lonely for friends.

LOnely for family.

I get involved with my day to day things, and forget my family is so far away...

Then I remember.

Remember that my family is not here.

That I am not part of a family any longer.

It is getting hard for me to handle this life.

It bodes no good.

I feel I am drifting.

Drifting in my own dark world of dispair and loneliness and hurt.

A world where nobody has been or is except me.

I don't want to be adrift.

Alone.

Alone and adrift in my own dark world.

I feel like I cannot connect.

Connect with anyone at all.

I just want one person.

One person who contects.

One person who will enter my own dark world.

One person who will grab hold of me.

One oerson who will not let me drift.

Drift alone and adrift in my own dark world of dispair and loneliness and hurt.

I feel so lonely.

I am hurting so much inside.

I don't want to be this way, but I don't see how to change it....

I don't want to go on like this anymore...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2004
Mon, 11-15-2004 - 2:45pm
I'm new to this also. Sounds like you can really use a friend and so could I.

It's really hard going through life when you don't have family close to you. I have suffered from depression for a few years now. I got help for it, and felt GREAT. I'm now starting to feel th signs of depression again, and I'm trying to be proactive and nip it before I get into trouble.

Please reply . . . I'd like to continue chatting with you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2004
Mon, 11-15-2004 - 6:54pm
I can agree totally with what you have said when I am depressed I feel like the whole world is against me and Im just not fit to live in it anymore. If you need someone to talk to im here too.

Roxanne

Lexapro 10mg for 3 weeks